My wife and I both recently graduated with B. Arch's from the same school. There are several local firms, and firms in larger cities, that we'd both like to apply to, having similar tastes in design and work environments. So our question is for the professionals out there - how should we go about contacting these firms and setting up interviews? Do we both pursue jobs and interviews independently and wait and see if the firms notice the similar surname and education background? Or do we contact them jointly, which seems odd, but would cut down on phone calls and redundant contacts. Would you be more or less likely to hire a husband and wife team? Would the dilemma of having two of them vie for a position make you more likely to choose neither? Ideally, we would like to work in the same office, as this would make longer hours more acceptable.
why oh why would you want to work in the same office? If I were hiring, there is no way I would hire a husband and wife. It just seems like a bad idea on many levels.
Some reasons not to work together:
1. you'll see each other all the time... all the time. you might want to have a relationship outside of your marriage, spending 24/7 with one person is just asking for conflict.
2. if one of you gains some sort of management/leadership role it could be even more awkward working with the other.
3. if you have some personal problem, it's more likely to affect your work.
Those are some of the possible negatives of working together. As far as applying for jobs, I would apply separately. If you want to apply to the same places, fine. I wouldn't expect to get hired together, and certainly wouldn't try to sell yourselves as a package or team, that's just weird. Most famous husband and wife teams own their own firms, which is almost a completely different job.
You wouldn't apply as a team with your best friend from school... why your significant other?
apply separately. Fresh out of school, you both stand to learn more - which is the point of the internship - by being in separate environments and comparing notes at the end of the day.
The only circumstances under which I would hire a couple is if one of them had been working for me for awhile already, and was known as a good and trusted employee. My old firm hired lots of friends of current employees, even the occasional SO, because a smart person usually only recommends other smart people to enter the same working environment.
on the extremely small chance that you are not both independently wealthy (because, of course, all architects are rich) then you do not want to be dependent on the same employer for your livelihood. if something happens to that firm (the boss dies, the niche market dries up, whatever) then you are both in trouble at the same time.
diversify your income stream (work for two different employers preferably working on different kinds of projects with different market cycles) as an insurance policy in addition to the fact that it will expand your collective abilities.
Bucksleeper: We're non-traditional students. I'm 31 and she's 28. We married 3 years before going back to school.
arrarrazzz: Learn to spell retarded and I might (doubtfully) care what you have to say.
puddles and liberty bell: Good points. We're not independently wealthy -- in fact, we have huge school loans, so it's probably best to diversify our income stream -- the only problem at this point is that there are only a few firms where we live (say about 30, corporate and boutique), so I guess we'll flip coins to see who applies where.
pencrush: 1 -- We are that randomly weird couple that can stand to spend 24/7 together.
2 -- This has less bearing because of the answer to number 1, but I do see your point.
3 -- Good point. We've never let personal problems interfere with what we know needs to get done, but a potential employer would not know that.
Don't flip coins - this is just my opinion, but I think you should both apply to all places. If they interview you, zero_point, and decide to hire you because they are impressed, also like your wife's work but don't need two people at this point, they might be willing to put a word in for her at other firms that are looking. Networks can never be too large - if someone calls one of your principals and asks if s/he has interviewed anyone with potential lately, you want you/your wife to be one of those people.
If the fact that you are both looking comes up in an interview, fine. No need to be coy about it, in fact probably better to be upfront. Again, networks can't be too large - you want to get your face and work, and your wife's, in front of as many people as possible.
if the two of you ever plan on running your own firm or the like, the whole "comparing notes" thing mentioned by liberty bell would come in real handy...having different ideas to bring to the table in the future, ya know what I'm tryin' to say?...
You could both work in the same office but in different capacities.
We recently had a husband and wife apply for posts within my office. The intention because they were the best candidates, was to put one in office, and the other as a project officer. So although they would work for the same organisation that their functions were very dissimilar.
In any case if you are a husband and wife team find DIFFERENT experiences that at the end of the day you can join forces and be a super design firm (just a thought)
yeah, aaronUF gets it - diversify your experiences as well, if you really intend to work together some day, then it will only be an effective leverage of talent if you have different experiences. otherwise there is no point in collaborating if you are both mirror images.
in fact, if you have too much in common, you'll put a burden on your firm by having two people splitting the same role when you really need help in other aspects of the practice. if you agree too much on everything, you'll damage your growth by using each other as bulwarks for whatever ideas you have rather than benefiting from constuctive criticism. your young practice will risk sclerosis right at the crucial time when it needs to be pliable, dynamic, and responsive to opportunity.
of course, all of this is conjectural but it doesn't hurt to think strategically.
Doing "your own thing" together is just fine, or at least it was for us every time we did i.e. some competitions on our own. Knowing each other can help a lot by communicatin a design concept even before you can sketch it up...
BUT: having worked (only for a short time) in the same office, that's not such a good idea...
Luckily we were not at the same project, but still as it was a small firm, we could not avoid being involved in each others boss-colleagues-clients-troubles. And that's just not that easy as soon as you have to take sides.
SO:
Starting our own business - everytime
Applying in the same firm - only if it happens to be that one in a million dream project we will work on.
There's no worries about us being mirror images of each other -- we both have very different skill sets that we are interested in expanding, and formally we design differently, as well. Besides, while I said above that we can stand to be together 24/7 (and have for the past 8 years, before school and during) that doesn't mean that we're always on the same page about what to do or how to do it. I do totally understand what Aaron and Puddles mean about having different experiences during the workday -- it does make for more interesting dinner conversation, as well as giving each of us another perspective about a given situation.
I guess what I personally was hoping for was a situation similar to the one Jam-arch describes, where we both worked at the same firm, but in (perhaps) widely different capacities. I can also sympathize with Urbanisto's experiences -- I wonder though, would the experience be any different at a large, corporate firm?
zero, just to give you some advice (take it or leave it), and this only has to do with architecture by association, but:
you should really try to make it a goal to not spend 24 hours a day with your wife. it creates completely untenable dependency issues. say, for example, your wife makes a lot of new friends and begins to spend a good deal of time with them. after spending 8 years together all the time, this could be very difficult for you to deal with. also, while spending all of your time together, what should be little problems can quickly become huge problems, especially if not talked about, and, again, when new people come into your tight circle, things can be thrown off-balance quite easily.
i only say this because my girlfriend of close to three years left me a few months ago. what i just described happened to us. but anyone who has been in a few serious relationships will tell you the same thing: give each other space to be individuals. as a few people have mentioned here, things are much more interesting when, at the end of the day, you both have distinct experiences to discuss and share with one another. there's a cheesy but true phrase that gets bandied around the internet a lot, by khalil gibran (whoever he is), that goes: "and stand together yet not too close together, for the pillars of the temple stand apart."
good luck with the job searching (obviously, i agree with those who say you should apply separately, and do not accept offers at the same place).
Jul 28, 05 4:32 pm ·
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Marriage and Architecture
My wife and I both recently graduated with B. Arch's from the same school. There are several local firms, and firms in larger cities, that we'd both like to apply to, having similar tastes in design and work environments. So our question is for the professionals out there - how should we go about contacting these firms and setting up interviews? Do we both pursue jobs and interviews independently and wait and see if the firms notice the similar surname and education background? Or do we contact them jointly, which seems odd, but would cut down on phone calls and redundant contacts. Would you be more or less likely to hire a husband and wife team? Would the dilemma of having two of them vie for a position make you more likely to choose neither? Ideally, we would like to work in the same office, as this would make longer hours more acceptable.
Besides having similar tastes, why would you two want to work in the same firm?
So they can bang on their lunch break?
-andrew
why oh why would you want to work in the same office? If I were hiring, there is no way I would hire a husband and wife. It just seems like a bad idea on many levels.
Some reasons not to work together:
1. you'll see each other all the time... all the time. you might want to have a relationship outside of your marriage, spending 24/7 with one person is just asking for conflict.
2. if one of you gains some sort of management/leadership role it could be even more awkward working with the other.
3. if you have some personal problem, it's more likely to affect your work.
Those are some of the possible negatives of working together. As far as applying for jobs, I would apply separately. If you want to apply to the same places, fine. I wouldn't expect to get hired together, and certainly wouldn't try to sell yourselves as a package or team, that's just weird. Most famous husband and wife teams own their own firms, which is almost a completely different job.
You wouldn't apply as a team with your best friend from school... why your significant other?
apply separately. Fresh out of school, you both stand to learn more - which is the point of the internship - by being in separate environments and comparing notes at the end of the day.
The only circumstances under which I would hire a couple is if one of them had been working for me for awhile already, and was known as a good and trusted employee. My old firm hired lots of friends of current employees, even the occasional SO, because a smart person usually only recommends other smart people to enter the same working environment.
on the extremely small chance that you are not both independently wealthy (because, of course, all architects are rich) then you do not want to be dependent on the same employer for your livelihood. if something happens to that firm (the boss dies, the niche market dries up, whatever) then you are both in trouble at the same time.
diversify your income stream (work for two different employers preferably working on different kinds of projects with different market cycles) as an insurance policy in addition to the fact that it will expand your collective abilities.
that is the most retarted thing I have heard in awhile..
Find your own goddamn jobs unless you are joined at the hip...
how old are you guys just coming out of school?
Spot on, puddles. Good advice.
Jeez, when did "spot on" enter my vocabulary? I think I learned it on archinect.
Bucksleeper: We're non-traditional students. I'm 31 and she's 28. We married 3 years before going back to school.
arrarrazzz: Learn to spell retarded and I might (doubtfully) care what you have to say.
puddles and liberty bell: Good points. We're not independently wealthy -- in fact, we have huge school loans, so it's probably best to diversify our income stream -- the only problem at this point is that there are only a few firms where we live (say about 30, corporate and boutique), so I guess we'll flip coins to see who applies where.
pencrush: 1 -- We are that randomly weird couple that can stand to spend 24/7 together.
2 -- This has less bearing because of the answer to number 1, but I do see your point.
3 -- Good point. We've never let personal problems interfere with what we know needs to get done, but a potential employer would not know that.
Anyone else have an opinion?
Don't flip coins - this is just my opinion, but I think you should both apply to all places. If they interview you, zero_point, and decide to hire you because they are impressed, also like your wife's work but don't need two people at this point, they might be willing to put a word in for her at other firms that are looking. Networks can never be too large - if someone calls one of your principals and asks if s/he has interviewed anyone with potential lately, you want you/your wife to be one of those people.
If the fact that you are both looking comes up in an interview, fine. No need to be coy about it, in fact probably better to be upfront. Again, networks can't be too large - you want to get your face and work, and your wife's, in front of as many people as possible.
just a relatively inexperienced comment, but...
if the two of you ever plan on running your own firm or the like, the whole "comparing notes" thing mentioned by liberty bell would come in real handy...having different ideas to bring to the table in the future, ya know what I'm tryin' to say?...
You could both work in the same office but in different capacities.
We recently had a husband and wife apply for posts within my office. The intention because they were the best candidates, was to put one in office, and the other as a project officer. So although they would work for the same organisation that their functions were very dissimilar.
In any case if you are a husband and wife team find DIFFERENT experiences that at the end of the day you can join forces and be a super design firm (just a thought)
yeah, aaronUF gets it - diversify your experiences as well, if you really intend to work together some day, then it will only be an effective leverage of talent if you have different experiences. otherwise there is no point in collaborating if you are both mirror images.
in fact, if you have too much in common, you'll put a burden on your firm by having two people splitting the same role when you really need help in other aspects of the practice. if you agree too much on everything, you'll damage your growth by using each other as bulwarks for whatever ideas you have rather than benefiting from constuctive criticism. your young practice will risk sclerosis right at the crucial time when it needs to be pliable, dynamic, and responsive to opportunity.
of course, all of this is conjectural but it doesn't hurt to think strategically.
I just want to share some personal experience:
Doing "your own thing" together is just fine, or at least it was for us every time we did i.e. some competitions on our own. Knowing each other can help a lot by communicatin a design concept even before you can sketch it up...
BUT: having worked (only for a short time) in the same office, that's not such a good idea...
Luckily we were not at the same project, but still as it was a small firm, we could not avoid being involved in each others boss-colleagues-clients-troubles. And that's just not that easy as soon as you have to take sides.
SO:
Starting our own business - everytime
Applying in the same firm - only if it happens to be that one in a million dream project we will work on.
There's no worries about us being mirror images of each other -- we both have very different skill sets that we are interested in expanding, and formally we design differently, as well. Besides, while I said above that we can stand to be together 24/7 (and have for the past 8 years, before school and during) that doesn't mean that we're always on the same page about what to do or how to do it. I do totally understand what Aaron and Puddles mean about having different experiences during the workday -- it does make for more interesting dinner conversation, as well as giving each of us another perspective about a given situation.
I guess what I personally was hoping for was a situation similar to the one Jam-arch describes, where we both worked at the same firm, but in (perhaps) widely different capacities. I can also sympathize with Urbanisto's experiences -- I wonder though, would the experience be any different at a large, corporate firm?
zero, just to give you some advice (take it or leave it), and this only has to do with architecture by association, but:
you should really try to make it a goal to not spend 24 hours a day with your wife. it creates completely untenable dependency issues. say, for example, your wife makes a lot of new friends and begins to spend a good deal of time with them. after spending 8 years together all the time, this could be very difficult for you to deal with. also, while spending all of your time together, what should be little problems can quickly become huge problems, especially if not talked about, and, again, when new people come into your tight circle, things can be thrown off-balance quite easily.
i only say this because my girlfriend of close to three years left me a few months ago. what i just described happened to us. but anyone who has been in a few serious relationships will tell you the same thing: give each other space to be individuals. as a few people have mentioned here, things are much more interesting when, at the end of the day, you both have distinct experiences to discuss and share with one another. there's a cheesy but true phrase that gets bandied around the internet a lot, by khalil gibran (whoever he is), that goes: "and stand together yet not too close together, for the pillars of the temple stand apart."
good luck with the job searching (obviously, i agree with those who say you should apply separately, and do not accept offers at the same place).
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