I'll never forget this comment by curt clay from a 'worst crits' thread years ago:
We had a guy who decided to do his floor plans in white pencil on black boards (for no apparent reason), but in the middle of the plan at the bottom of a long, curving and descending ramp. He went through this LONG explanation about how once you descend down this ramp and turn this corner you would be greeted by his marvelous invention: "The AQUACOLUMN" and this fish tank that wraps around the column would hold piranhas and other exotic fish.
One simple question from the crit about the slope of his ramp and it was all over for him. It was obviously too steep and all of the jurors start into this story that went like this:
"so I lose control of my wheelchair on your 35% sloped ramp...."
"as your fingers are getting caught in the spokes of the wheelchair..."
"then I look up....."
"and you're heading straight for a fish tank..."
"... with piranhas inside..."
"so you crash into the fish tank..."
"shards of glass have sliced my arm off...."
"the rushing water knocked a little 3 year old girl off her feet nearby..."
".. who was just trying to see the fish..."
"I'm soaked and wet as 300 gallons of water are flowing over me..."
"... so I'm drowning...."
"and I have piranhas flapping in my lap
"or eating everyone else's legs who was standing in the lobby..."
"if they haven't already drowned or been sliced up by all of the glass..."
"or eaten by the piranhas..."
the entire room was exploding with laughter as they were doing all of these crazy hand motions and swimming motions to enact their story..
he just sat there silent and never cracked a smile...
4 Comments
I'll never forget this comment by curt clay from a 'worst crits' thread years ago:
We had a guy who decided to do his floor plans in white pencil on black boards (for no apparent reason), but in the middle of the plan at the bottom of a long, curving and descending ramp. He went through this LONG explanation about how once you descend down this ramp and turn this corner you would be greeted by his marvelous invention: "The AQUACOLUMN" and this fish tank that wraps around the column would hold piranhas and other exotic fish.
One simple question from the crit about the slope of his ramp and it was all over for him. It was obviously too steep and all of the jurors start into this story that went like this:
"so I lose control of my wheelchair on your 35% sloped ramp...."
"as your fingers are getting caught in the spokes of the wheelchair..."
"then I look up....."
"and you're heading straight for a fish tank..."
"... with piranhas inside..."
"so you crash into the fish tank..."
"shards of glass have sliced my arm off...."
"the rushing water knocked a little 3 year old girl off her feet nearby..."
".. who was just trying to see the fish..."
"I'm soaked and wet as 300 gallons of water are flowing over me..."
"... so I'm drowning...."
"and I have piranhas flapping in my lap
"or eating everyone else's legs who was standing in the lobby..."
"if they haven't already drowned or been sliced up by all of the glass..."
"or eaten by the piranhas..."
the entire room was exploding with laughter as they were doing all of these crazy hand motions and swimming motions to enact their story..
he just sat there silent and never cracked a smile...
Sorry, Dubai.
I am continually amazed. Dubai is just one metaphor after another. This stuff writes itself.
Metaphors are in the eyes of the beholder.
yes, in a figure ground sense...
but still i wished the glass was
beholding
the fish.
- auto poetry series, oa
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7wf-Q1ZpKU
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