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"Kant is a moron" graffitied on the philosopher's home
Image via theatlantic.com
Russian police say they're looking for the intellectually minded miscreants who graffitied "Kant is a moron"—along with a flower and heart—on the philosopher's home outside Kaliningrad.
With Arthur Schopenhauer dead for 155 years, however, authorities start off with few strong leads.
— theatlantic.com
The derelict house does look like an easy target for vandalism, but apparently the philosopher never even actually lived inside. The Atlantic points out that the local structure Kant lived in was destroyed sometime in the 19th century, and the tagged building was in fact a new one built on the same site. Which, apparently, relieves The Atlantic of treating this as a preservationist issue, and instead gives free reign to cram in as many of Kant's philosophical principles as possible. See below:
- "They say no reason, pure or otherwise, was given for the crime."
- "Even the timing of the crime is unclear—journalists discovered the note, at once crude and rather refined, while exploring Kant's derelict home."
- "But for those who would reclaim the discipline's more raucous reputation of the past, the graffiti is perhaps a positive sign, and maybe the first salvo in a war between Situationists and Enlightenment thinkers. Indeed, a critic of Kant's ideas might feel a categorical imperative to take such direct action."
- "We don't have any way of proving this to be true, of course—nor any way to prove that it is false."
- "But for the sake of morality, it is perhaps enough to believe that the house is Kant's, and that the vandalism is therefore immoral."
- "Fans of the philosopher are left hoping that police can determine who is behind the petty crime, and that they can be rehabilitated by the justice system."
- "Yet as the great man warned, "Out of the crooked timber of humanity, no straight thing was ever made.""
The Telegraph, reporting on the same story, includes some insight into preservation efforts:
- "The vandalism came to light when local journalists visited the village of Veselovka, outside Kaliningrad, to check on a continuing lack of long-promised restoration work on the historic building." So no headway there.
- "Despite years of promises to restore it, the building is run down, close to collapse, and favoured by the local youth as an underage drinking den, reported newkaliningrad.ru, a local news site." But perhaps "underage drinking den" is the preservationist strategy?
- "Last year the local government announced a plan to open a Kant museum in the village, but so far little has materialised." Better stick with the decrepit den.
8 Comments
This entire article is hilarious and wonderful, but it's so cleverly written that it does make *me* feel like a moron, myself. Whatever, let's have a drink and sing along:
"Eeeeeeeeeeemanual Kant was a real pissant who was very rarely stable!
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar who could think you under the table!
David Hume, could out-consume, Wilhelm Freidrich Hegel!
And Wittgenstein was a boozy swine who was just as sloshed as Schlegel!
There's nothin' Nietzsche couldn't teach ya 'bout the raisin' of the wrist.
Socrates himself was permanently pissed....."
Kant is a punk ass fool. You are either with Zumthor or Eisenmann, you can't be both.
Written in the present tense, it must've been put there by a rival philosopher from across town.... or maybe just tagging by disgruntled Prusskie youth lookin' for trouble.
Great drinking song there, Donna. What, is it shots of absinthe that get tossed back here?
Maybe Russian gangs are more sophisticated.. the Kant Imperative Gang vs the Nietzsche Nihilists vs the Hume Blokes vs the Debord Spectacles vs the Deleuzian Rhizomes vs the Derrida Anti-structuralists.....
Sophist Stoners................Platonic Squares...........Zeno Archers.........Descartes Doubters................Leibniz Monads (one of the most seriously dangerous gangs)............Frege Frage (questionable German gang)..................Cantor Infinites................Huxley Acid...........Marx Communists?!?!
^ Great list... now what would be emblazoned on those leather jackets? Nothing, I suppose, for the Nietzsche crowd...
Nietzsche Nihilists made a cameo in the Big Lebowski and I believe you are correct Citizen, they only wore black leather jackets.
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