i think after a few yrs, they become more advanced, and start using fake columns...

but no fake columns yet... only leaves and bubbles--gotta keep it simple

"information architect"....shudder....

by contractor......" oh, so it's architectural concrete " (meaning it has no structural value-thus complete fluff-thus architects are morons.....)

*verbage*

as in, "we'll cover that with some verbage in the specs."

idiot.

"oh, I like the 1st idea that you had" (after 6 revisions thru an art jury that has run you & the client thru hoops on fire for several too many meetings)

"that's impossible" (contractor comment because its not what they want to do or are too entrenched to learn new anything)

"oh, YOUR drawings ARE WRONG" (- actual contractor comment to a bridge engineer on a municipal project)

"that is what the contract says" (read it again)

"Elegant solution" (its a box) (engineers - we should all become engineers........)

"how bad do you want it?" (planning dept. staffer comment in West Hollywood)

"I don't really care what you come up with.."

After I spend 45 minutes w/the PM watching him sketch his ideas.

the i-wish-i-had-a-successfull-practice, thus pretending/wishing/hoping to be eloquent and profound (in front of the actual successful fellow jury members), who precedes ever statement as a critic with one of the following......

"One would think...."

"One could suggest/deduce..."

"contextual modernism" (lots of brick, but still a nice box)

"parlor suite" (this is what you call a hotel room that's bigger than the rest of the rooms, or 'kings'...hotel design is the embodiment of capitalism)

"porte cochere"...(this is a fancy way to say, 'covered drop-off')

not a phrase per se, but a cringer nonetheless:

"sconce"

and yes, "i'll shoot you an email" has to be at the top for all time cringers.

"signature building"

skin, as in "we can skin it to look however they want"

a word that makes me cringe is value, in any context . . .

"We value you as a customer"
"We value your contribution to the firm" (but we're not going to pay you more)
"Family values"
"This product is a great value"
"Value engineering"


I don't value value.

"why don't you make the basement an alternate?" proj. arch.

i'm sorry, i may be a newbie, but even i know thats one hell of an alternate, heck that's another project

just that word bugs me, 'alternate'.

why not just 'fess up and say, "I can't afford it."?

'be creative. we're interested in seeing your ideas.' translates to:

we like traditional things and we really don't want to do anything more than add space that looks just like the space we already have; we're simple, normal people and we like the same things everyone else likes; but if you can make it cheaper, more efficient, and maintenance free - we're interested in your ideas.

maintenance-free

any phrase using "funky" as an architectural adjective.

for example:
"ooohhh... that building is funky"
"lets put some funky brackets under that overhang"

from an actual job interview where portfolio work was shown:

"so you drew these on the computer?"

translates to: "so you know autoCAD? sweet. we'll stick you in a cubicle, pay you whatever we want because you are desperate, and you'll operate CAD all day with no design input whatsoever...we'd draw it ourselves if we were computer literate, but since we're not, we'll sketch it, you'll draw it...congratulations on receiving your masters."

"what program did you use to render these?"

translates to: "i'm going to ask you some questions to get a feel for what this place is missing and so i can communicate better w/ my peers and sound knowledgable about new technologies. it won't really matter, because we're not even going to buy 3d software and i'm going to sketch all presentation drawings. hey, i didn't spend 25 years as an architect so that you can come in here w/ your fancy computer and undercut my ability to color...besides, our backwoods clients would never go for something that crisp and clean."

ugh...i still cringe when i think of that day...

smallwood, stewart & reynolds
cooper carry
or perhaps tvs

which is it weave?

suv or sport utility vehicle

notion

Adding 'or what have you.' to the end of a sentence drives me nuts. At my last staff meeting, a designer used that phrase at least 12 times in one continuous stream of consciousness.

'at the end of the day' was running well out in first place on my list until that fateful day.

Oh yea, I like that one-
"Can't do that, the code says...." (from the idiot who has no brain)

I call asking for Mr. So and So, the secretary says, "He is out of pocket". I say, "Well then, he is an easy target for a big sack".

Someone calls with the intention of talking to the boss and asks, "Is HE in"? I say, "No, God is out buying bras for his wife, shall I say a prayer for you"?

"That is a Choice Choice".

And one of my all time favorites-
Starting every single sentence with A C T U A L L Y !!!!!!!!
STOP IT, NOW!

plexus1,
i'm afraid it's none of the above.
check your email.

Hey weave, spot on!

gustav,
while i really don't know what the phrase "spot on" means, it doesn't make me cringe. if it's about dropping names on this forum, i won't do it. as you probably know, the professional world can be very incestuous.

weave
"from an actual job interview where portfolio work was shown:"

That was "On the Money"!

"lets not throw the baby out with the bath water"
My ex boss used all the time jerk

Oh yeah, he would use "we" alot when he was referring to me.
"did we forget to call them back?"
" did we deliver that set of plans yet?"

We're pregnant

"i don't want you to spend too much time on this..."

How about those Norm Crosbyisms (malaprop):

"Intonation is the sincerest form of battery."
"Apparently there has been some sort of excommunication here on the InterNest."
"If I reprehend any thing in this world, it is the use of my oracular tongue, and a nice derangement of epitaphs!"
"Many people are morally opposed to intravenous fertilization."
"Comparisons are odorous."
"I resemble that remark."

Most annoying: "What it is is..."

Personal fav: (while smiling) "Don't walk away angry. Just walk away."

it use to be,
'are you muslim or somthin'?'
now, nobody fucks with us.

"WE need to hump this one" the boss says as he is walking out the door at 4:30 Friday afternoon.

"I will CREATE a space especially for you".

"now we're cookin' with gas!"

We need to sump this one.

I will cremate a space especially for you.

Now we're firing on all 8.

"You need to manage your time better"

This from the jerk that just changed his mind, again, not 15 minutes ago for a presentation package that gets sent out ASAP. And it's 4:30 on a Friday afternoon as he departs for a pleasant weekend. What's worse is the...

"Have a great weekend!!" as he waltzes out the door. And he actually means it.

Guess who's "taking one for the team" on Saturday.

This one is always a precursor to long hours. When your head designer comes ALL the way over to your desk and whispers
"Your going to hate me for this....BUT..."

After proposing a different way to build...

I think it's best to go with the "proven system."

boss constantly says: "the prospect is" followed by a sentence/explanation of what he is trying to achieve.

also, in relation to something i've designed: "you'll learn."

There is nothing new under the sun, stick with the tried and true.

Also in relation to something I designed, "You got lucky".
In relation to something the boss designed, "Learn from the Master".
My response is, "Oh you're just baiting me".

first middle and last name strung together by my mom. this used to be an almost silent violent cringe. i wanted to shudder violently, but i was frozen. not a problem now.

if my wife does this though, i laugh. the effect wore off a long time ago.

gustav,

speaking of learning from the master, my last boss would say that as well, but it would almost make me break into laughter each time, because i knew he was such a bad ripoff of say FLW, and his previous boss.

what's with the interior design bashing? i'm an interior designer at an architecture firm and i've never considered using fake columns or foliage in my life (nor have my coworkers), and would quit immediately if my firm would allow that. and i agree- the person who said 'flair' was definitely trained on television.

its not so much interior design bashing, as it is bad interior design bashing.

mgdesigner-

I meant no disrespect by the 'fake column' comment. Its just something our ID on this project has done, and the phrase makes me cring. I don't hate the ID for this, I blame the PA or PM for not taking that shit out. They don't even question it. Healthcare.

classic from 3yr undergrad (this person never went into masters)
'this ramp is for the wheelchair people'

from the profession (usually from id's or my former bosses)
'architectural feature' and 'sex it up a bit'

"couldn't be happier with it, not sure what its doing though....it could be a chicken."

'your project is too glossy, it needs more grit' - now thats quality critique

sometimes i get "you're the fancy designer" in a smart-ass tone from co workers when there is a design problem they have no idea how to solve. Usually it seems like they mean it in a condescending way.
fancy? like mcdonald's ketchup?