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Different take on the bailout plan

fulcrum

Guys,
I've just received the following email from one of my friends, and I just want to share it with you. I know that there are a lot of holes in the argument, but it's just fun to read.

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I'm against the $85,000,000,000.00 bailout of AIG. Instead, I'm in favor of giving $85,000,000,000 to America in a We Deserve It Dividend. To make the math simple, let's assume there are 200,000,000 bonafide U.S. Citizens 18+. Our population is about 301,000,000 +/- counting every man, woman and child. So 200,000,000 might be a fair stab at adults 18 and up..

So divide 200 million adults 18+ into $85 billon that equals $425,000.00.

My plan is to give $425,000 to every person 18+ as a We Deserve It Dividend. Of course, it would NOT be tax free. So let's assume a tax rate of 30%. Every individual 18+ has to pay $127,500.00 in taxes. That sends $25,500,000,000 right back to Uncle Sam. But it means that every adult 18+ has $297,500.00 in their pocket. A husband and wife has $595,000.00.

What would you do with $297,500.00 to $595,000.00 in your family?

Pay off your mortgage - housing crisis solved.
Repay college loans - what a great boost to new grads
Put away money for college - it'll be there
Save in a bank - create money to loan to entrepreneurs.
Buy a new car - create jobs
Invest in the market - capital drives growth
Pay for your parent's medical insurance - health care improves
Enable Deadbeat Dads to come clean - or else

Remember this is for every adult U S Citizen 18+ including the folks who lost their jobs at Lehman Brothers and every other company that is cutting back. And of course, for those serving in our Armed Forces.

If we're going to re-distribute wealth let's really do it...instead of trickling out a puny $1000.00 ( "vote buy" ) economic incentive that is being proposed by one of our candidates for President.
If we're going to do an $85 billion bailout, let's bail out every adult US Citizen 18+!

As for AIG - liquidate it.
Sell off its parts.
Let American General go back to being American General.
Sell off the real estate.
Let the private sector bargain hunters cut it up and clean it up.

Here's my rationale. We deserve it and AIG doesn't. Sure it's a crazy idea that can "never work." But can you imagine the Coast-To-Coast Block Party! How do you spell Economic Boom? I trust my fellow adult Americans to know how to use the $85 Billion. We Deserve It Dividend more than I do the geniuses at AIG or in Washington DC. And remember, The Birk plan only really costs $59.5 Billion because $25.5 Billion is returned instantly in taxes to Uncle Sam.

Ahhh...I feel so much better getting that off my chest.
Kindest personal regards,

Birk

T. J. Birkenmeier, A Creative Guy & Citizen of the Republic

PS: Feel free to pass this along to your pals as it's either good for a laugh or a tear or a very sobering thought on how to best use $85 Billion!!

 
Sep 24, 08 6:10 pm
binary

i hear that..... i just want 100gs

Sep 24, 08 6:12 pm  · 
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MArch n' unemployed

i would look good in an audi r8

Sep 24, 08 6:22 pm  · 
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Living in Gin

Interesting idea, but wouldn't that just cause inflation to skyrocket? If everybody is suddenly walking around with $200k in their pocket, wouldn't restaurants start charging $500 for a cup of coffee?

Sep 24, 08 6:33 pm  · 
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Living in Gin

...And besides that, the guy's math is wrong. $85 billion divided by 200 million adults is only $425 per person.

Maybe we should be putting that money into public schools instead...

Sep 24, 08 6:40 pm  · 
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vado retro

hey with that 425 bucks you could go to men's wearhouse and get a nice moderately priced job hunting suit...

Sep 24, 08 6:53 pm  · 
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binary

i managed to get a suit for 100...the shoes for 125...the belt to match the shoes.... then some suspenders if you want to delete the belt option and look 'stylish'...then add a brim hat and some cuff links..... and some dark socks........ then a pair of chuck taylors if you need to cut the rug and still look good


Sep 24, 08 6:58 pm  · 
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vado retro

rock it beau brummel!

Sep 24, 08 7:09 pm  · 
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won and done williams

that emailer wins the moran prize of the day.

Sep 24, 08 7:21 pm  · 
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Workshop B

Weird to a redneck in a flag bandana with a mullet holding up an intelligent sign! He probably has a McCain Palin sign in the other hand though!

Way to write a huge email about an large amount of money for everyone only to find out we only get $425, not $425,000! Thats less than the stimulus check we just received.

Thanks for wasting 10 minutes of my life that I could have been spent drawing another door detail.

Sep 24, 08 8:08 pm  · 
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fulcrum

haha, that's right, oops. Sorry for posting it without crunching the numbers. Now my buddy has some explaining to do.
jafidler, I'll make sure he gets that image.

Sep 24, 08 8:31 pm  · 
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Workshop B

This is all over the net now...no more chain emails please!

Sep 24, 08 8:33 pm  · 
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