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kill your cell phone

ochona

sorry, this is just a rant based on something i just witnessed in our office:

one of the senior designers is working with a VERY junior designer getting a major proposal out. he (senior) and she (junior) are discussing a task to be done when her cell phone rings halfway across the room on her desk.

immediately--in the middle of the senior designer's sentence--she rushes over to her phone...picks it up...and answers it, proceeding to spend five minutes making social plans for the evening.

afterwards: no "sorry about that!", nothing. it is as if there was absolutely nothing wrong with what she did. and she didn't even bother to ask the senior designer to finish his sentence.

does this type of situation seem completely, totally wrong to anybody else besides me?

it's a situation i've seen countless times, just never in the kind of high-stress situation we are having in the office today. whenever that stupid f--king phone rings, people will drop EVERYTHING to answer it. normally nice, courteous people like our junior designer.

have we progressed to such a low state of self-worth that we have to constantly validate ourselves by showing others that we are "in demand" by yapping on our cell phones?

do we feel so useless that we have to make sure we solve whatever problem is on the end of the line just so we can feel some sense of accomplishment in our meaningless american lives?

are we so disconnected from each other that we have to grasp at any and every straw possible to stay "in touch" with the few people we actually come into contact with?

yes/yes/and yes.

so here are some rules of cell phone etiquette and if you have something to add please do. and if you think our junior designer didn't do something completely disrespectful, don't apply to work at our office.

If you are talking to someone face-to-face and your cell phone rings, you either:

a. Silence it. Show the other person you respect them and what they are saying enough to both keep listening and remove any distractions from what they are saying. It doesn't matter how high or low they are in relation to you.

b. Let it keep ringing. Ignore it, it'll stop ringing eventually. Act like the other person is so important, you're not even paying attention to anything else.

c. Or, if you look at the caller ID and you HAVE to take the call, you plead, "I'm sorry, this might be some kind of emergency, would you mind if I took this call?" Then, if it's not some complete crisis on the end of the line, you ask them the other person if you can please call them back. And then, like a courteous person, you do when the time is right.

 
May 3, 06 6:04 pm
Auguste Perret

What was the senior designers response?
I agree with the etiquette, is that your office policy? Maybe we've gotten to the point where offices need to explicitly state a cellphone policy?

May 3, 06 6:10 pm  · 
 · 
broccolijet

ochona -- i couldn't agree more...unfortunately it seems that with new technology making people more accessible, many people are losing sight of whatever minimal manners they might have been taught regarding face-to-face conversation (assuming they were taught this at all). somehow people have lost their priorities and with it the appropriate comity.

as auguste perret alluded...i think that was a perfect opportunity for the senior designer to provide a little on-the-job training regarding courtesy and priorities...especially considering the personal nature of the call.

it's sad that this even needs to be addressed, let alone explicitly captured in an office policy. but if that's what it's come to...

May 3, 06 6:19 pm  · 
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larslarson

i personally keep my phone on vibrate all the time so as not to bother my coworkers...and i hardly ever answer it at work..unless it may be urgent...but never if i'm in mid conversation or under a lot of stress to finish something.

May 3, 06 6:25 pm  · 
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ochona

our office is VERY informal, very laid-back, and there are no office policies whatsoever. we're treated with respect and -- typically -- we treat each other with respect. that's why the senior designer's response was to not do anything about it. and ultimately, i don't think the junior designer was being rude intentionally or even deliberately being inconsiderate.

it's just that our society ACCEPTS and CONDONES this kind of behavior by not saying anything.

it goes way beyond this. i see people answer the cell phone during dinner conversations at restaurants, at the cash register at the grocery store, even in the drive-thru at mcdonald's. my own wife wonders why i just let my cell phone ring away if we're at dinner. she'll typically look at it, hand it to me, and i just silence it.

whoever it is can either call you back or do without talking to you.

broccolijet, you put it exactly right. we've LOST our priorities.

May 3, 06 6:30 pm  · 
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sameolddoctor

ochona, well stated...thankfully in our office everyone has a 'cellphone ettiquette'. If we really really need to take the call, only then we state its an emergency and use it. I am of the stern belief that in most cases if its an emergency the person on the other end WILL call again....

lately ive got my friends to text-message me so that if its really urgent i can look at my phone and excuse myself, then call again. I really wish text-messaging was more popular in the US.

Worse is people with crackberrys. They think they need to be more connected than anyone else in the world, almost to the point that their 'being connected' validates their fucking paycheck.

May 3, 06 6:31 pm  · 
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sameolddoctor

the crackberry folk generally being the obnoxious project managers...

May 3, 06 6:37 pm  · 
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A Center for Ants?

ochona-

i really don't think our society accepts and condones such phone usage. i'm sure almost everyone here would frown on such behavior.

some people just weren't taught or are mindful of simple etiquette. what i find is more of a cultural thing (and which may be tied to bad cell phone etiquette) is those that find they can't be away from their phone for a second. namely that guy or girl w/ the bluetooth on that won't take it off.

aside: i was at a concert trying to enjoy the band, the boy least likely too, and this guy in front of me was wearing his bluetooth earpiece which happens to have a extremely bright blue flashing LED. it was right at my eye level and was extremely bright and annoying.

May 3, 06 7:41 pm  · 
 · 

i got rid of my cellphone a year ago and my life has been better since.

i also want to point out that the person adjacent to me has the theme song from star wars as their ring. person across the room has the emperial march song. person in front has the christopher walken skit where he impersonates han solo. feel free to form your own opinions...

May 3, 06 7:59 pm  · 
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tworings

this reminds me of a great prank that i helped orchestrate a few years ago...

it was my freshman year of undergrad, and i had a friend who absolutely would not turn his cell phone off. even in class he would keep it on because he was neurotic about potentially missing a call. we decided to intervene. it was the week before finals, and i used my novice photoshop skills to create a flyer for a new pizza place in town, called "big jeff's pizza" (his name was jeff). they were offering a grand opening special of two large one topping pizzas delivered for $5.99. they also boasted "tempe's only 24 hour pizza delivery". we listed his cell phone number on the flier, and printed 200 at kinko's. next, we pinned them up and and passed them under doors all over a few dorms. within an hour, his phone was ringing non-stop. he still refused to turn it off, even after 30 or so pizza orders the first night.

May 3, 06 8:12 pm  · 
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broccolijet

after a bit more consideration on this topic i have to add to the bitter invective...

somehow, joe schmoe seemed to get by just fine in the days before cellphones and blackberries when he had to leave me a message and wait for me to return his call. how much information is REALLY that time critical where i have to turn it around in less than 10 minutes or even an hour??

very little, i venture to say.

i see people abuse this technology with trivialities all the time. there is nothing that can't wait 10 or 15 minutes.

ACfA: the arrogance of that guy wearing a bluetooth headset at a concert where, should his phone ring, he wouldn't be able to carry on the conversation anyway! it befuddles me.

bottom line...no one and nothing is that friggin' important.

some legitimate source should publicize and widely disseminate a list of do's and don'ts regarding this sort of etiquette to educate the masses.

May 3, 06 8:13 pm  · 
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broccolijet

tworings, that's fantastic! too bad it didn't work

recommend phone probation..."i'm sorry, the person are calling is currently unable to practice proper cellphone etiquette and is serving a probationary period of <x> days. they will be reachable again at this number on <date>. please leave a message or try again after this date." beeep.

May 3, 06 8:18 pm  · 
 · 
A Center for Ants?

one thing that scares me is that they're considering allowing cell phones in airplanes. i really really hope they don't. because when i'm flying on my 5 hour red-eye to the east coast, the last thing i will need is some annoying ass talking through the entire trip. i swear cell phone use in airplanes would increase air-rage exponentially. full on cabin-wide no-holds-barred choking-you-with-the-emergency-mask-cord-that-i-pulled-before-using brawls.

dot-

where do you work? a computer help desk? an IT department somewhere?

May 3, 06 8:19 pm  · 
 · 
A Center for Ants?

oh: start drawing wall sections and details using the following info:

May 3, 06 8:19 pm  · 
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broccolijet

good thoughts ACfA...another way might be to use metal framing for the entire substructure as i believe this just acts as a farraday cage preventing RF signals from entering or leaving. i'm sure one of the physicists here can confirm, deny, or correct me.

May 3, 06 8:23 pm  · 
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Hasselhoff

I like my cell phone, but also hate cell phones. What did people do before cell phones? Oh yeah, they waited and got the call later. I hear the conversations people have in studio and there is just no need to ever have those converstations. I like my cell because I can multi-task. I.e. call my parents while walking to school. But that thing stays on vibrate (I don't really know what my ring sounds like). It's nice to be able to be in touch while you are away from home, for example, you can answer job interview calls, or call various customer service lines etc. But yeah, for the most part, I don't get the obsession. Like when you see someone pull out of their drive way and they are already on the cell...what's that? Dumb.

May 4, 06 2:50 am  · 
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in our office there is a strict cell phones must be turned OFF policy during office hours, which seems harsh, but you get used to it.
you do all your private calls at lunch.

any other offices have such a policy?

May 4, 06 5:46 am  · 
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theWanderlister

God... then you'll hate to work in China/Hong Kong... for all the reasons you stated above. Zero etiquette here in terms of talking on the Cell... i've been here for 7 months... and it still shocks me...

May 4, 06 6:18 am  · 
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Nevermore

one professor in college used to spend endless minutes yapping at the top of her voice holding her cell at her ear.( on all topics..latest designwear she bought..latest boyfriend )

Then One fine day ..

..when she was at it as usual..(at her vocal and audible best.)

The phone rang ! lol


May 4, 06 6:47 am  · 
 · 
whitllam

Yes, if any sort of electromagnetic communication is attempted in or out of a room that is mainly comprised of metal / metal wiring / etc., the signal is interrupted by a principle known as Gauss' Law (yes, the room would be referred to as a Farraday cage). In the old Electrical Engineering Building at Purdue (built in the 1920's), the architects specified the use of chicken wire in the walls to reduce the amount of interference between experiments conducted in adjacent labs, which today renders cell phone service relatively impossible unless you are in a room with a large window or near the front doors.

May 4, 06 7:20 am  · 
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the building where our office moved in december makes our cell phones not work. we have to move toward the windows, too. solves some of the problems people have described, but also keeps impt contractor calls from coming in, etc. i've had to start leaving my phone on someone else's desk up by the window.

May 4, 06 7:26 am  · 
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sporadic supernova

we have an unspoken code with respect to cell phones in our office.

always on silent or vibrate ... and never answer in inside the office .. always step out !!

frankly all that i need in a cell phone (extra features) is a calender and a time and alarm feature.

May 4, 06 7:27 am  · 
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chas

I'm utterly amazed by the rude cell phone behavior that seems to be normal accepted behavior. When someone continues talking on their cell phone while buying a cup of coffee, paying cab driver, checking out at the grocery store, etc. it saying "My stupid little conversation is more important than actually looking you (service person) in the eye and speaking to you as another human being worther of my attention"

Maybe people who do this, or the junior designer, are not really intending to disrespect anyone, they just don't realize how their actions are perceived.

May 4, 06 11:36 am  · 
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dot-

where do you work? a computer help desk? an IT department somewhere?

acfa,

nope. i work in an architecture office. not the hippest bunch, but we have fun.

May 4, 06 11:52 am  · 
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ochona

i am glad to see that i'm not alone. when i was in college cell phones were just becoming popular. there was this woman in our studio who, well, we all rather disliked her (to put it mildly). she fancied herself a student politician rather than an architecture student and rarely if ever actually attended class or studios. but she had a rich daddy who maybe donated some money so she got As and Bs.

she used to yap on and on about stupid crap all studio long. one day (and i swear this is true) she said -- out loud -- on her cellphone -- "i thought he [date?] was like, you know, kinda nice, but he wasn't, like, jewish and didn't, you know, have any money...so like, no? we can't, like, go out again?"

the first minute she set her cell phone down by her desk one of my studiomates went over, took out the battery, held it over the trashcan, and poured a coke over it and stuck it back into the phone. to my recollection it never worked again.

May 4, 06 11:58 am  · 
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aml

well, i'm a teacher at a university and although it's the university's policy that cell phones must be turned off in classes, i always have a hard time with students. finally, i just said the next phone that rang during class would be thrown out. and i went through with it. nice arc and landed right on a green area outside [would have been satisfying if it had broken in lots of pieces, but thankfully it didn't- don't want to be reprimanded]. these were freshmen and apparently the legend has grown over time. now they're asking me if i really destroyed a phone.

right now i'm incorporating it into my class rules- if your phone rings or is discovered to be on [can't even be on vibrator- why would you take a call in the middle of a lecture?] you will be thrown out of class, and will have an absence. the university here has an attendance policy and students are forever trying to skim by, so an absence is punishment to them. a friend that works at another university is just confiscating phones that ring, and giving them back the next class, but regretably my university won't allow me to do that.

May 4, 06 12:25 pm  · 
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A Center for Ants?

there were a few professors in school that had a policy that any phone that rang, they would get to answer and you had to let them. turned out to be pretty funny.

May 4, 06 12:30 pm  · 
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aml

ACfA, that is a great idea! may try that one...

May 4, 06 12:31 pm  · 
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4arch

steven: the politically correct term for chicken wire is "poultry mesh"...at least that's what they call it at home depot now.

May 4, 06 2:19 pm  · 
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4arch

etiquette is not just a problem with cell phones. i've always been shocked that store clerks in a one or two person operation will drop everything to run for the phone when they're right in the middle of doing business with me. i also think it's rude that when i'm standing at a coworker's desk having a work-related discussion, they will still drop everything and pick up the phone if it rings. i have no way of knowing whether it's a 2 minute call or a 30 minute call so i just stand there awkwardly until i either get waved away or just get impatient and slink away on my own.

May 4, 06 2:27 pm  · 
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PetePeterson

ochona: great thread I'm right there with you.....

For several years I have seriously been considering writing a book or some sort of manual on 'Cell Phone Etiquette'.
This basically came about from a high-maintenance now ex-girlfriend who would leave her cell ringer on all day, all night, when out for dinner etc.... She would answer the thing no matter the circumstance.... I won't get too specific here... but...yeah use your imagination.... just f'n brutal!

As ochona said at the top, it's a pretty sad reflection on society today but until my Book gets published everyone keep fighting the good fight!

May 4, 06 2:54 pm  · 
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ryan mentioned chick...poultry mesh. it wasn't me, man.

May 4, 06 3:03 pm  · 
 · 
A Center for Ants?

petepeterson-

did you date paris hilton?!

May 4, 06 3:05 pm  · 
 · 

i was at a wilco concert last year and some teenage chick in the front row was yapping on her phone... in between songs jeff tweedy reached down and snagged the phone... he started talking into the phone on the mic... turns out it was her mom... jeff told her that the concert was over yet and that she was interrupting it...

May 4, 06 3:11 pm  · 
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oops... wasn't over yet...

May 4, 06 3:24 pm  · 
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Ms Beary

I find it strange when my co-workers are on the phone during work having long personal conversations. Sure CAD is boring, but should you be able to entertain yourself by calling your friends/family/spouse and shooting the breeze while drawing those wall sections? They talk very softly, sneakily, but I can still hear you!

I think all personal calls at work should be limited to 1 minute. "I'll be home at 6:30, can you pick up dinner? Thanks Honey." Hang up. "Did you remember to turn off the iron before you left? You did? Good, see ya at home." Hang up. (I am quite the narrator lately).

The worst is when you are talking with someone and you don't realize they have just picked up their cell and you think they are still talking to you. A little confusing and embarrassing.

E-mail is the same way. Have you ever talked to your boss, he gets an e-mail, reads it and responds all within your sentence. Then turns back to you and is like, What's Up?

May 4, 06 3:30 pm  · 
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PetePeterson

ACFA... that's perfect...
because I actually would call her 'paris' from time to time...

May 4, 06 3:42 pm  · 
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Auguste Perret

There seems to be a double standard in school; I've seen the dean walk through the studio, give a little talk and mention that all cell phones should be turned off during studio, and then, the next day, during a desk crit, my professor would sit down, place his notepad and pencil down, next to his coffee (on my drawing!!!) and cell phone and if his phone rang, he'd pick it up and walk away to take the call.
During mid or final review faculty were always getting up to take calls.

Now that I think about it, all the younger people in our office send texts or e-mails. It's just easier.

May 4, 06 4:20 pm  · 
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momentum

i hate headsets. i hate seeing people walking around with a headset/earpiece in all the time when they aren't on the phone. its one thing if you work in a call center, but jeebus, all the time?! i see more and more people jacked in at all times. it boggles me.

i don't even like my wife calling me at work. i'm here trying to acomplish something, and i'm getting paid by someone to do it.

all that being said, i guess i just don't like talking on the phone.

by the way, in terms of the original post, that person would no longer be working for me, period. the utter lack of respect for what the senior designer has to say is cause enough for me to bitch slap them into next weeks unemployment line.

May 4, 06 6:59 pm  · 
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Hasselhoff

I saw some jackknob talking on her cell phone while on a treadmill today. What a hole.

May 5, 06 3:14 pm  · 
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Barrett

It's going to be a dark day if they ever wire the NYC subways for mobile phone use in the subway cars, jesus, its bad enough that people won't move out of the way of an open door, how condiderate do you think they'll be on their phones?

May 5, 06 4:07 pm  · 
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Barrett

I saw this on a design website a few months back, appropriate for this thread, and printable PDFs to boot

Cell Phone Silence Cards

May 5, 06 4:29 pm  · 
 · 

brilliant and free!

May 5, 06 4:41 pm  · 
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