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Is this a sign of a bridge burnt with an employer?

yyy3

Hi everyone, I just want to get your take at this situation. Around one year ago, I was a fresh graduate looking for jobs, and landed an offer from a firm that I had interned at before (Firm A), and I also got an interview at another firm (Firm B). I had a good interview with Firm B, but it was the end of the year so they were not able to give me a solid contract until after the new year. Firm A had asked me to respond to their offer before the holidays, so I had asked Firm B if they can give me an offer as soon as possible. I had sounded very eager, and I had a call Firm B's HR to talk about my situation. She later sent me an email outlining their offer to me, and promised a formal contract as soon as the holidays are over. I then asked Firm A if they can match the offer of Firm B, and Firm A's HR said she will let me know after the holidays. Holidays are over, and both offers come with similar salary and benefits. Ultimately, I decided to go with Firm A because they had offered to put me on a project type that I was interested in at the time. I called Firm B's HR on the deadline of their offer to tell her my decision, and thanked her for all of her help. She sounded pleasant in response to my decision, so I asked if we can stay connected on Linkedin, which she said OK to. After our call, I emailed her to thank her again and expressed an interest in working with Firm B in the future, to which she responded pleasantly to. We stayed Linkedin connections for around half a year, and then I noticed that she removed me as a connection. Would you say I have burnt a bridge with Firm B for rejecting their offer in the end in spite of sounding so eager in the beginning? 

 
Feb 6, 21 1:38 pm

Firms make offers that get rejected all the time. Any HR person who does this regularly won't take offense to you rejecting the offer. My guess is they probably just got tired of seeing what you post on LinkedIn popping up in their notifications so they unfollowed you. Or they couldn't remember who you are and unfollowed you. They're also just the HR person. They're not the ones making the ultimate decision about who to hire at the firm. Unless you are applying to the HR department, the HR person is not who you need to be connecting with at a firm.

If the key to getting you a future job at Firm B, or any other firm that HR person might be working at in the future, is being connected to the HR person on LinkedIn ... that's a pretty narrow problem and likely something that can be easily overcome by being connected (even tangentially) to literally anyone else in the company. If you had *actually* been staying in contact with the HR person, this wouldn't be an issue anyway. 

The connections you have on LinkedIn are not an accurate representation of your professional network. 

Also, have you been wondering about this for half a year? 1) accept an offer from Firm A after the holidays ... 2) commit to staying connected to Firm B on LinkedIn ... 3) notice after half a year that they are no longer connected to you ... 4) wonder for half a year if you've burnt a bridge ... 5) post about it on Archinect.

Feb 6, 21 4:23 pm  · 
2  · 
yyy3

"Also, have you been wondering about this for half a year? 1) accept an offer from Firm A after the holidays ... 2) commit to staying connected to Firm B on LinkedIn ... 3) notice after half a year that they are no longer connected to you ... 4) wonder for half a year if you've burnt a bridge ... 5) post about it on Archinect." Haha, you sure

Feb 6, 21 5:47 pm  · 
 · 
yyy3

Sorry, my previous comment got cut off for some reason. I just wanted to say that you read my mind exactly haha. I am new to the industry and I don't have a very strong network in my current city, so I am trying to keep whatever contact that I can. I was able to use Linkedin to set up some good informational interviews in the past, so I am not too sure what the weight of each connection is from a professional perspective. That's why I posted here to get some thoughts.

Feb 6, 21 6:30 pm  · 
 · 
Kinsbergen

I 've also been wondering about this. Some time ago I interviewed with a very good firm I was interested in interning with. The interview was conducted online given the Covid situation and there were some technical issues which made the interview a bit awkward. The interviewer commented positively on my portfolio and experience, however didn't accept my LinkedIn invitation after the interview. I can't help but wonder whether I made a bad impression to him and therefore he didn't want to stay in touch. Also, I am curious as to whether I could reapply successfully to that firm.

Feb 6, 21 4:33 pm  · 
1  · 

I rarely even accept LinkedIn invitations from people I actually work with. Stop taking it personally if you meet someone once and they don't want to be connected to you online for the rest of their lives.

Feb 6, 21 5:01 pm  · 
1  · 
geezertect

In the grand scheme of life, none of us are that important to people we don't even know.  You're just a unit of production.  Affinity, loyalty, and all that kind of stuff is for your personal relationships, not in business.  Everybody is just looking out for themselves, so you should do the same.  It's nothing personal, just business.

Feb 6, 21 6:09 pm  · 
5  · 
SneakyPete

I haven't logged in to LinkedIn for years. It's not as important as the company wants everyone to think. 



Feb 7, 21 12:18 pm  · 
5  · 
Non Sequitur

I got 3 different job recruiters emails this week on my LinkedIn account. Sorry random lady, but I’m not moving to Sudbury to take up a role in a A&E mega firm.

Feb 7, 21 12:32 pm  · 
3  · 
citizen

Pete and Non, I just sent you each an invitation to connect. Fingers crossed!   =O/

Feb 7, 21 3:31 pm  · 
2  · 
Non Sequitur

citizen... don't make me go through that mess for nothing. I have dozens of waiting invitations that need my attention...none of which I recognize.

Feb 7, 21 3:39 pm  · 
1  · 
Wood Guy

I find LinkedIn to be useful for getting in touch with people I don't have email addresses for but that's about it. Non, you should now recognize at least one request, lol.

Feb 7, 21 4:12 pm  · 
1  · 
Non Sequitur

I do.

Feb 7, 21 4:48 pm  · 
1  · 

In my last office someone somehow used the all staff email address as their email when they set up their LinkedIn account. So everyone saw it happen and when the first notifications started coming in that "so-and-so wants to connect," it was funny the first and maybe second time. But when it was apparent that no one was fixing it, I took matters in my own hands.

I reset the password to their account. Of course all the password reset emails went out to the all staff email account, so I did it late one night when I was sure hardly anyone would see them come through and beat me to it. I didn't want to do anything malicious, I just wanted to change the email associated with the account to be their own email.

My failure was that I didn't realize I wouldn't be able to delete the all staff email until a new email had been verified. I had set it to their work address, but I obviously didn't have access to that, nor did I want to change it to my address and let everyone know it was me messing with the account. So in the end I couldn't delete the all staff email address from their account. I think the next day the password was reset a couple of times before the emails stopped. I'm assuming IT stepped in and took care of it.

Feb 7, 21 5:10 pm  · 
 · 
Volunteer

..


Feb 7, 21 2:04 pm  · 
1  · 
randomised

Everybody's always bragging about their achievements on LinkedIn, all this fake positivity and success. Nobody ever posts their screw ups and failures on it...it is all so fake I hate it and all my 500+ connections ("Great archinect session this weekend, feel so empowered! #empowerment #makeadifference #successisachoice")What Instagram and their filters did to the self-esteem of perfectly normal looking people, LinkedIn is doing to people with perfectly normal white-collar jobs.

Feb 7, 21 5:39 pm  · 
1  · 

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