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Surviving increasingly social architecture education as an extreme introvert

Kyle_Meister

current status: struggling

To give some context, I'm a second year arch student who had to take a year between my first year and my current studies due to a few missing general credits in math and communications (the irony has been extremely apparent). This has put me in a particularly awkward position where I don't know most of my classmates and have missed out on the shared sense of struggle that is architectural education, while those I have that shared sense of struggle with are all a year ahead of me or have dropped architecture. 

This has led to me seriously questioning myself and in turn severely shook my confidence in my place at the college, leading me to multiple fight or flight moments (100% flight) from which I have had to be coaxed out of via my advisors and parents.

With that being said, my second year has been much more of a struggle as I've been having to deal with the stress of being in this situation as someone who is extremely introverted along with the pressures of collaborative design, shaking off an extra year of rust in comparison to my peers, and on top of that, constantly monitoring my own mental health. 

I dealt with my introverted behavior my first year by working overnight in the arch hall. As unhealthy as it sounds, I truly enjoyed working this way. However, I feel can't ask this of myself given reasons stated above, nor from my peers as it's rather an unorthodox style of work ethic for the midwest and obviously somewhat selfish from someone else's perspective. 

Am I simply not cut out for contemporary architecture? Or put in a less defeatist tone, how do I return to that initial sense of personal enjoyment in my work while balancing the collaborative nature that architecture is being taught?...Or is this a pointless ranting of questions that I should be asking my professors and advisors? 

Regardless, all responses would be welcome, no matter how negative, sarcastic, or obvious. (this is the internet after all)

 
Sep 28, 18 12:46 pm
Non Sequitur

You're so very early in this game... so early.  Find a design angle you are comfortable with and abuse it to death until you feel ready.  If working in the dead of night works well for you? Then fuck what those wanker classmates of you think... just do your thing.  I, although not introvert as you describe, choose the 7pm to 3am work routine for almost my entire undergrad and grad school.  That was my creative time where shit got done while studio time was to bounce ideas off peers and faculty.


Sep 28, 18 1:04 pm  · 
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Kyle_Meister

Thank you for the reassurance, hearing it from people who have been through architecture programs is a great help. In terms of design angle, were you referring to design methods and styles?

Sep 30, 18 5:05 pm  · 
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thatsthat

In terms of not knowing your classmates, ask one person to get a drink - or a coffee or lunch - after studio.  Once you make one friend, it's easier to meet some others.  Maybe it's the person you sit next to, maybe its the person who has work you find interesting.  Most people like food, drinks, and talking about themselves so if you go some version of that route, you should be fine.

Also, try to keep in touch with those who are a year ahead or have dropped out.  They can still be fun to spend time with when you want to blow off steam or get another opinion on some work.

Sep 28, 18 4:38 pm  · 
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thisisnotmyname

There are lots of niches in contemporary professional practice were a person can largely work by themselves. 

Don't be discouraged by your current school situation.

Sep 28, 18 4:46 pm  · 
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curtkram

i'm INTJ, "the architect"


if this is at a point that it's affecting your ability to comfortably live your life, seek help.  go to a psychiatrist.  they can talk you through what you're going through, and an SNRI or something like that might help level you.


you probably need to make friends with your classmates.  in time, you'll need to go on job interviews, work with clients and consultants, etc.  humans are social animals that rely on cooperation for survival.  use this time to learn how to overcome your anxiety.  if you get nervous with the idea of initiating a dialogue with other people, practice pushing past it.  i think it sort of works as they explain in this link https://www.mentalhelp.net/art... operate conditioning like this can be fixed with behavior modification, but it's probably best to work with a professional (psychiatrist or psychologist) through that.


be aware of the stress you're feeling:  know when you need to get away to be alone, then find how to make that happen.  I used to be a smoker, which gave me an excuse, but not anymore.  you could go outside for a walk or something like that.  moving around is probably more healthy than sitting quietly.  find whatever works for you.


this isn't what i do; i do not have the training or credentials to give this advice, so take with a grain of salt.  good luck.


i'll try to come up with a snarky and sarcastic response next week.

Sep 30, 18 5:20 pm  · 
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randomised

You'll never get to know your classmates if you're not in studio when they are. Get over that first hurdle by just going to studio when everyone's in. Maybe at first just isolate yourself by wearing noise cancelling headphones and focus on your work and give it time. Just being in the same space at the same time can already be a start because don't worry your new classmates also share that same struggle as your previous class, you just didn't get the chance to get to know them or vice versa. But if you need to work overnight just to get things done once in a while don't worry too much about it and go for whatever works for you because in the end it's your education, just try to still show up as much as possible around the time everyone's in, even with your headphones on. And take enough brakes. If it gets to be too much, too many impressions, noises, people, distractions, step outside for a breather and take a walk around campus.

Oct 1, 18 3:02 am  · 
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randomised

Note to self: punctuation!

Oct 1, 18 5:04 am  · 
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archiwutm8

Take it when you're around people for now, when you're in the industry you can just tell people to get fucked and go home after work.

Oct 2, 18 4:56 am  · 
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i currently teach undergrad arch. and would highly advise that you communicate this with your teacher or the department head / director NOT JUST an advisor. explain to them your concerns and that you would like these issues to remain confidential. it may not seem like it, but schools are very sensitive to these kinds of things (the mental health of students). arch school can be tough socially and the struggle might feel like part of the pedagogy, but trust me there is a lot of effort and concern from the educators' perspective about the kinds issues u r having. take advantage of the school as a resource for helping you in your situation.


Oct 2, 18 11:44 am  · 
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MDH-ARCH

I can somewhat relate. I was a few years older than my classmates and felt I was on a different level. But I did experience many fight or flight moments. The anxiety and stress plus presentations and reviews in front of peers totally crippled me some days. But if you want it bad enough, STICK IT OUT. maybe pop a xanax or something before a presentation. I can say as time goes on you build confidence, the feeling does fade. and life after school is tremendously better for me at least. I tell people those were my toughest years but it makes you stronger and life goes on. 

Oct 2, 18 11:55 am  · 
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archeyarch

do your best, its never going to be ideal.  as you move further in your program, you will deal less and less with the idiots who are in the beginning levels.  

Oct 7, 18 4:58 am  · 
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