It's full of amazing things. It's so beautiful your eyes will have blood coming out of everywhere. Folks, this is really the best architecture you can imagine. I mean we are talking about things so monumental they make the pyramids look like ruins. I'm defining styles you haven't even heard of while developing my own rules and proportions that are much much better than anything other architects use. I would never copy someone else's work because they are inferior, I oversee the drawing every detail myself. I make sure that it is all drawn with the top software and displayed in cutting edge VR. Other architects are going to make you look at PDF's. If you hire me I will let you see my portfolio when your project is done. So you can see how amazing the work is. It's seriously wonderful. absolutely amazing. I can't believe other architects are even still trying. Thier portfolios are such losers compared to my portfolio. Those buildings they design will probably fall down at some point. you won't even be alive and my buildings will still be standing there. Looking magnificent being incredibly awesome. like me.
WOW! I wonder does he teach others his magnificent, sufficient, effective, magnificentness, to all of us newbies just trying to get by with boring low budget projects.........lol
It's not about the money. I have self-funded my education. This is about restoring architecture to it's previous glory. Seriously some of the things you people have built are criminal. I can't believe you're not in jail. Just shows how broken this system is. We have people like you out there working on the same types of projects as an architect of my level.
Make Architecture Great Again: Hire Jonathan to design your building
Sweet three job offers above. One for 12/hr one for 10/hr and a teaching job that pays really well I'm assuming. Keep them coming people lets have a bidding war!
This portfolio is so freaking huge my back hurts from swinging it around all day.
I mean seriously people IDP, NCARB.. the AIA.....? The system is broken. All of these other architects are part of that system. I manipulate the system. The system works for me. That's called leadership. It's what you want when you are hiring an architect. Not some push over who will spend 7 years bouncing around the system. Not some lazy architect who will let correction cycles spin on forever while your financing flounders. Get with the program people. Hire someone great.
i'm going to one up you with this dream employee description.
I'm fully proficient in Revit and auto cad doing real world projects. I can also use sketchup and render. I have experience doing everything from CD's to CA and i'm local to your area and do not need a work visa. also, i've done all this with only 1 year of experience so you can pay me whatever the legal minimum wage is in your area, and i'll work overtime for the empty promise that you'll make me famous and/or that i'll get a fat bonus check during christmas.
My door schedules are completely fabulous, exactly what people need to order correctly and to negotiate the best deals on those orders.
I usually have my son directly oversee all poured in places gypsum sheet products and let me tell you: they turn out better than any poured sheetrock detail you have ever seen. You can't even tell the sheetrock was poured. These details are that good!
I will only pay for the most magnificent, sufficient, effective, selective, intuitive, decisive, ultra magnificent, magnificentness architecture professor that can teach how to build skyscrapers in minutes and can create architects that are better than the world has ever seen in seconds for a once and a life time salary of 20/hr!
You are amazing... So amazing that I will work for you, virtually, and remote to give you a universal presence! I'll only charge $100/wk to represent you in a virtual universe; marketing very hard to all those people in that totally virtual target market; It's HUGE, UNTAPPED, and TRENDING NOW! Plus I have the mental power and fortitude to keep adding folks to my virtual world so you can be assured I'll never run out of super major portfolio commissions for you to relish and pour your heart into. Seriously, you can not afford to wait!
I'll PM you for where you can send my paychecks since I'm already landing you huge commissions in a totally untapped market!
A five-year program that's way more rigorous than the best out there now. Its' not going to be accredited though because I don't play by those rules. Accredited programs are for losers who just follow the herd. I will make you an awesome architect. Just look at all the mediocre architects these schools turn out! We have not created one single mediocre graduate ever! Greatness is all we create.
You can also enroll in our masters of real estate program too which you will need to be truly great. Like me.
Submit your deposit today to being living your life with unparalleled design ability. Learn from the best. Work for the best. Be the best. Only at Seagull University.
We are interested in nominating you for our fast-track hiring process, where we will do a skype interview while I am waiting to board my flight to Abu Dhabi and/or Patagonia, followed by an uncoordinated group interview with any of the old men present in our office that day, after which you will receive either a mumbled verbal rejection or extended and indeterminate opportunity to wait for a formal offer letter.
This process is only open to our most prestigious candidates. Please indicate what relevant experience you have. Include only total hours worked, not dates of employment for each of the following:
1. BIG, New York Office
2. BIG, other location
3. Other (optional category)
If you choose to proceed, we will determine the appropriate salary for your position, and you will have an opportunity to see this number after passing a short 36-month trial employment period. We believe you have the special qualities shared by the elite few who can succeed in our challenging and spiritually rewarding environment!
My portfolio is huge
It's full of amazing things. It's so beautiful your eyes will have blood coming out of everywhere. Folks, this is really the best architecture you can imagine. I mean we are talking about things so monumental they make the pyramids look like ruins. I'm defining styles you haven't even heard of while developing my own rules and proportions that are much much better than anything other architects use. I would never copy someone else's work because they are inferior, I oversee the drawing every detail myself. I make sure that it is all drawn with the top software and displayed in cutting edge VR. Other architects are going to make you look at PDF's. If you hire me I will let you see my portfolio when your project is done. So you can see how amazing the work is. It's seriously wonderful. absolutely amazing. I can't believe other architects are even still trying. Thier portfolios are such losers compared to my portfolio. Those buildings they design will probably fall down at some point. you won't even be alive and my buildings will still be standing there. Looking magnificent being incredibly awesome. like me.
sounds good. You're hired at $12/hr.
i'll go down to $10 and you'll be famous. like, local newspaper famous. published.
Curt, $10/hr is not that much to ask an intern with this high-level of skill to pay you for the privilege of working for you.
WOW! I wonder does he teach others his magnificent, sufficient, effective, magnificentness, to all of us newbies just trying to get by with boring low budget projects.........lol
3MB or GTFO
It's not about the money. I have self-funded my education. This is about restoring architecture to it's previous glory. Seriously some of the things you people have built are criminal. I can't believe you're not in jail. Just shows how broken this system is. We have people like you out there working on the same types of projects as an architect of my level.
Make Architecture Great Again: Hire Jonathan to design your building
Sweet three job offers above. One for 12/hr one for 10/hr and a teaching job that pays really well I'm assuming. Keep them coming people lets have a bidding war!
This portfolio is so freaking huge my back hurts from swinging it around all day.
Great, you can start by picking a colour for the EIFS cladding.
It's going to be marvelous
With brass ornamentation
How are your door schedules? Do you know the best way to detail poured Sheetrock?
Those toilets better be solid gold, and able to handle a lot of ....
I mean seriously people IDP, NCARB.. the AIA.....? The system is broken. All of these other architects are part of that system. I manipulate the system. The system works for me. That's called leadership. It's what you want when you are hiring an architect. Not some push over who will spend 7 years bouncing around the system. Not some lazy architect who will let correction cycles spin on forever while your financing flounders. Get with the program people. Hire someone great.
Make architecture great again.
Jonathan,
i'm going to one up you with this dream employee description.
I'm fully proficient in Revit and auto cad doing real world projects. I can also use sketchup and render. I have experience doing everything from CD's to CA and i'm local to your area and do not need a work visa. also, i've done all this with only 1 year of experience so you can pay me whatever the legal minimum wage is in your area, and i'll work overtime for the empty promise that you'll make me famous and/or that i'll get a fat bonus check during christmas.
LOL, well played!
@ josh
My door schedules are completely fabulous, exactly what people need to order correctly and to negotiate the best deals on those orders.
I usually have my son directly oversee all poured in places gypsum sheet products and let me tell you: they turn out better than any poured sheetrock detail you have ever seen. You can't even tell the sheetrock was poured. These details are that good!
I will only pay for the most magnificent, sufficient, effective, selective, intuitive, decisive, ultra magnificent, magnificentness architecture professor that can teach how to build skyscrapers in minutes and can create architects that are better than the world has ever seen in seconds for a once and a life time salary of 20/hr!
You are amazing... So amazing that I will work for you, virtually, and remote to give you a universal presence! I'll only charge $100/wk to represent you in a virtual universe; marketing very hard to all those people in that totally virtual target market; It's HUGE, UNTAPPED, and TRENDING NOW! Plus I have the mental power and fortitude to keep adding folks to my virtual world so you can be assured I'll never run out of super major portfolio commissions for you to relish and pour your heart into. Seriously, you can not afford to wait!
I'll PM you for where you can send my paychecks since I'm already landing you huge commissions in a totally untapped market!
The current offer is now @ 20/hr. I may open a university
A five-year program that's way more rigorous than the best out there now. Its' not going to be accredited though because I don't play by those rules. Accredited programs are for losers who just follow the herd. I will make you an awesome architect. Just look at all the mediocre architects these schools turn out! We have not created one single mediocre graduate ever! Greatness is all we create.
You can also enroll in our masters of real estate program too which you will need to be truly great. Like me.
Submit your deposit today to being living your life with unparalleled design ability. Learn from the best. Work for the best. Be the best. Only at Seagull University.
Fly The Highest. Except Nothing Less
JL,
We are interested in nominating you for our fast-track hiring process, where we will do a skype interview while I am waiting to board my flight to Abu Dhabi and/or Patagonia, followed by an uncoordinated group interview with any of the old men present in our office that day, after which you will receive either a mumbled verbal rejection or extended and indeterminate opportunity to wait for a formal offer letter.
This process is only open to our most prestigious candidates. Please indicate what relevant experience you have. Include only total hours worked, not dates of employment for each of the following:
1. BIG, New York Office
2. BIG, other location
3. Other (optional category)
If you choose to proceed, we will determine the appropriate salary for your position, and you will have an opportunity to see this number after passing a short 36-month trial employment period. We believe you have the special qualities shared by the elite few who can succeed in our challenging and spiritually rewarding environment!
I'll offer $14 an hour plus benefits. Great benefits.
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