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Here's some advice!

Byrle

Lately I've noticed a ton of complaining on this site. But, I guess the important thing is to keep a super positive attitude. What happens with a real positive attitude about life and other general stuff? Here's what happens. Read on to see what happens.
I've got this friend who is this super positive guy. Because he is so positive he landed this great job as the voice on the answering machine! If you have an answering machine from between 1999 and 2002 (Sanyo brand), there's a good chance that's my friend's voice there on the machine! Recognize this? “I am unable to take your call. Please leave a message after the tone.” That's him! Some people like to “customize” their message by recording their own very unprofessional sounding voices. This is called a “voice-over” in the answering machine industry and the manufacturer does NOT recommend it. Please do not “voice-over” the pre-recorded message. Because that's my good friend on there!
So he got that great job and now the guy is a real celebrity. He just seems like a normal guy at first but then if he drinks a little he sort of goes into his answering machine voice. Say we're out at a restaurant or bar or something. He'll have a few drinks and then start talking in that voice. I swear the whole place will get real quiet when they hear that voice. People sort of quit mid-sentence to listen. Then, suddenly, there'll be all these people surrounding him and sort of asking him to say different phrases in that voice. Some people would like him to say real crude stuff in that voice. He doesn't do it, though. He's got a ton of dignity and does not want to besmirch that classic voice with foul sounding crap. What I like best is when he says the normal message, just like the one on the machine. It's terrific! Because of that voice he's always meeting a ton of nice ladies and making good friends, like me.
Lately he's been sort-of down in the dumps, though. It used to be that I could call him up at any hour of the day and ask him to say that message. It would always cheer me up if some crappy thing had happened. On some really crappy days, I would call him around twenty times or so. He'd always say the message for me and I'd instantly feel cheered up. Just last week, though, here's what he said to me when I called: “Why don't you just listen to your damn machine?” I mean, can you believe this guy? Why the hell would I want to listen to that old recording when I can hear, like, the live performance whenever I want? Stupid bastard. That's the thing with some people; they just don't know how to be grateful. They lose their positive outlook and start to say real stupid crap to their good, good friends.

 
Jun 22, 06 2:01 am
Nevermore
Jun 22, 06 2:14 am  · 
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Jun 22, 06 2:28 am  · 
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Jun 22, 06 2:30 am  · 
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Jun 22, 06 2:34 am  · 
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Jun 22, 06 2:36 am  · 
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Nevermore

dont be glum, chum !

There are other fish with fine voices !

Jun 22, 06 2:48 am  · 
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