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help with office miscommunication and lack of mentoring

Ms Beary

I have some problems with my working environment. Hopefully some archinectors can give me some hope.

The issue is that I don't seem to be able to get feedback or have meaningful information exchanges with anyone I talk to except another intern at my office. Nobody understands my questions, my concerns, my reasonings etc except this other intern. What is this mentoring stuff and why isn't it working for me?

I cannot discuss design issues with the architects in my firm. I will draw something and talk about it and show areas where I need input and critique and show what I think is working and I will get a response like "that looks like work from 'our competiter' HA HA" (read: crap) or a nice drawn out "...not what I was thinking..." or just a blank stare or a change of the subject.

When I talk with the fellow intern, we can critique each others work - no egos are damaged, we can be candid and true, she understands what I am doing, why it's not working and what I need from our conversation, and we greatly benefit from each other's input. We understand each other and can communicate very well with words, sketches or images. We can disagree and agree and be comfortable with it. I must add that me and this other intern don't have anything in common except our approx. age, sex, and job title and we actually view things very differently, architectural and non. We are cordial work associates but not "friends". But with others in the firm, namely the older male architects - I can ask questions and I get a bunch of bull crap nothing talk that gets me no where.

I can think I am doing some good things, working through the project, designing some solutions and someone will ask me "have you done the code research yet?" and I have done it thank god with no help from you of course (my first real code check that involved looking at more than one page), and I can show my work and say this is what I conclude and this is how we should look at it and this is why and please let me know if I left something out or misinterpreted anything cause I am new to this you know and i get the response "SO you're not comfortable doing code research..." and then a look like - sheesh what are you good for anyways, and you want to be an architect? And then get told "I wish you'd have written it all out." But I did write it all out and I am holding it in my hand here can't you see this typed up sheet?! Let me guess - not the way you would have done it! I got no answers to the questions I raised. No feedback on the thoroughness of my research or the conclusions I presented. Just a sad sigh cause it will have to all be redone now cause the intern is incompetent.

As an intern, I have gotten thrown around in projects as was convenient up until now, doing mostly cad work, design and presentation - typical intern stuff. But I have never been able to do things that weren't billable - like follow along to a final punchlist or learn what architects really do. I have never been involved in a project all the way through. I have even driven by job sites to my surprise have seen work being done that I had worked on the design of but had no idea it went thru. They have purposely kept me on a need-to-know basis for everything and used me as was convenient. Now I am supposed to step up to project manager and I have never been exposed to many aspects of the job and feel I have been set up for failure. It seems it is everyone else's job amongst the architects to "mentor" me and no one wants to help me understand what it takes to be a project architect.

I can even ask a straightforward question such as "How do we determine what codes we should abide by for this job?". (There is no local building official to call and ask.) I got an answer several weeks ago that I was using to determine some things. Now the same question came up today, but with a different answer. I take two steps forward and three steps back!

Now my "official NCARB mentor" is even ignoring me the last few weeks. We had communicated weekly thru e-mail and he just stopped e-mailing me back several weeks ago with no excuse. I'm afraid I asked too many difficult questions and questioned too many things about how architecture works. He never cared to answer all my questions anyways, just a few and then he'd tend to brag about his multimillion dollar condo project and how talented his design team is. I was willing to let his ego thing go just to have a mentor that could answer some questions for me outside of the firm. Now I don't even have this cause I am going to fire him tomorrow.

Is this a men are from mars and women are from venus thing? Or I have to wonder if I am "threatening" somehow. I know architects aren't teachers, but I am not participating in any meaningful interaction with any of the architects in my firm that helps me understand what we are doing, why, and how to do it. During conversation where I try to initiate conversation to help me understand the phone will ring or they will look at thier watch and tap the toes like I am wasting thier time or they say you're a smart kid, figure it out. Really, should I be just figuring out stuff at my experince level? I get way overwhelmed way fast with this method and it can't work. I am at my wits end and ready to call it quits.

 
Jan 25, 05 9:35 pm
b3tadine[sutures]

if i were you i would take what you wrote above and hand it to the principal[s] in your firm. it is personal, eloquent and gets to the point, if after that they can you, then you know that this firm is not for you and good ridance...

Jan 25, 05 9:51 pm  · 
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Ms Beary

thanks. i already know they are not for me. a little detail i hide from them and i pretend otherwise as hard as it is. i am just waiting for the best opportunity to leave which hopefully is early this summer.

Jan 25, 05 9:59 pm  · 
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Suture

If you dont care enough about a firm to make it better than just move on to another firm that will be a healthier situation for you ASAP.

Jan 25, 05 10:32 pm  · 
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liberty bell

Strawbeary, from what you describe your employers/co-workers are treating you really badly and in an extremely short-sighted way. They should WANT to better your understanding of the work so that they can later depend on you to do the work without a lot of oversight - that is the idea of investment in the interns that I see happen only rarely in much of the architecture profession.

In my experience so many firms are extremely short-sighted and cynical; they don't mentor their interns because they expect the kids will bolt at the first opportunity, what a self-fulfilling prophecy! I'd say follow betadinesutures' advice: print out what you wrote, give it to at least two principals or associates (so they have to take some responsibility for it), and tell them you want to schedule an employee review within 5 days of when they get it. Even after these efforts, though, it sounds like it's time for you to move on. Good luck to you -and maybe try to find a firm with at least one or two female higher-ups!

Jan 25, 05 10:49 pm  · 
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Suture

Everyone agrees- format your thoughts into a nice letter...but dont place ultimatums like a review in 5 days. Just ask them out to a coffee break when they soon have a chance in the next few days. If nothing else you will get a free cup of joe and clear some things off your chest.

good luck because im glad that there are still people who care.

Jan 25, 05 11:17 pm  · 
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Aluminate

I agree that you should look for another position - even if just for having the comparison of working in a few different firms. This will definately be helpful with your doubts and probably with answering a lot of your questions (though it will likely raise lots of new ones.)

Personally, if I were considering moving on within a few months, I wouldn't invest too much time and effort in trying to develop a whole new dynamic of communication in the current firm at this point. I think your energy would be better spent in a speedy job search.

I do have some questions: how long have you been with this firm? Have you worked in other firms previously? How much experience do you have? Where did you find your NCARB mentor?

With regard to the latter: I don't know exactly what your relationship is with this person or how you found him, but many people who volunteer to be mentors for IDP expect to pretty much follow the NCARB recommendation of getting together or speaking on the phone a few times per year - mainly to discuss your progress with IDP. Your mentor may not have anticipated answering a lot of detailed questions on a fairly constant schedule. It sounds as if you need someone who is willing to put quite a lot more time into this on a regular basis. You should probably shop around for a new mentor. Perhaps another intern you know could recommend someone more gung-ho about the mentoring job (perhaps even consider as a mentor a young-ish, newly registered person who has never mentored before - this may be the best way to find someone with the enthusiasm for this (not to mention that they probably won't be bragging about their latest skyscraper.)

There are a few things I'd recommend regarding the situation in your firm: First try presenting your work in a more confident manner. Some of the comments you're getting (such as the one about you being not confident with code research) seem to be reactions to the manner in which you're presenting the work and the self-deprecating things you're saying (reiterating that you're new to this, asking for them to point out what you've missed, etc.) It's understandable that you'd want feedback and may not feel 100% confident in everything you do, but you may be overemphasing this yourself to the point that some of your coworkers' reactions may actually be their way of expressing slight exasperation/annoyance with this. In other words: because you're starved for feedback you're pleading for it in a way that may seem needy. Some people react to this by running in the other direction - i.e. giving you the blank stare, the dismissive brief comments, etc.
You may get better results by handing things to your supervisors in writing (such as your code analysis) without saying anything, INSTEAD of walking them through it verbally first. Just assume that if they have questions they'll ask, and if you did something greiveously wrong they'll tell you.

Second: regarding all these "not the way I would have done it" comments. Can you find previous similar examples of the tasks you're working on? For instance, with the code research write up: could you look in another file and find something similar on which to base your format? Also: there has to be a code official who is responsible for the jurisdiction in which the project will be built. Whether he/she is "local" or not you need to identify this person and get in the habit of calling him directly with your questions. Instead of asking every question to someone in the office (and getting different answers) get in the habit of at least trying to find the answers yourself, from the appropriate sources, and documenting this information.

Third: you say you're supposed to step up to Project Manager. If that's true then this firm must have some confidence in you - maybe more than you have in yourself. It is typical with many of us that we learned things as we were thrown into them. I don't think anyone in any firm is usually completely trained in any position prior to being promoted to it. If they're going to make you into a PM then - even if everything you do "isn't what I would have done" they must believe that you would do is usually OK.

Fourth: I don't think that the firm is purposely keeping information from you - such as when things go into construction. I think they're just thinking of the most expedient way to get the project done and you're probably just not entering their mind at all. I know that doesn't sound good either - but what I mean is that there's no deliberate attempt to slight you.


If you're really planning to leave this firm anytime soon (within a year or so) then I'd absolutely recommend against printing any of this and giving it to the principals. In the environment you're describing I don't see this resulting in anything positive. Just move on professionally and don't burn any bridges.

Jan 25, 05 11:38 pm  · 
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TED

DO NOT write a letter. it has a very long life, talk. so many young staff have a different view of what the world is. not that i dont believe what you say.

by talking directly you are able to respond/react as needed just incase you missunderstood. trust me code issues, what is current etc, do and can change be it a new code adopted by a local guy, schedule change anticpates a different version, etc. dont take it personal, no one wants problems on a project. rewrite your thoughts in a positve light in terms of how to communicate etc. go to the person you directly with first, dont jump over his head. , casual lunch etc. some older staff become very cynical and sometime just need a reminder. dont just focus on the problems at lunch--bond with this person, have him/her tell you some history etc.

Jan 25, 05 11:45 pm  · 
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Ms Beary

Our president is a complete ass though. I think I'd get told to clean out my desk and take a hike. I think my above letter has too many crass examples to print out and I don't want to be finger pointer or a whiner. Sorry, I really can't see myself doing this.

I have tried to address this verbally one on one with a higher-up, the most reasonable one, at one good opportunity I had several months ago as I tknew I was lacking some experiences that I needed to be a good architect. The blame was turned on me and conversation cut short. And... I ended up crying, gosh that sucked.

Seems like I need help in getting them to want to help me. Like, why should they mentor me? They have me convinced that I'm just supposed to do it and it will get redlined anyways so what's the big deal. But is that really the way to do things? I am so confused. If architecture was that easy we wouldn't have to get licensed, do the school, have mentors, do CEU's and IDP and what not. And we also couldn't brag about how hard it was.

What I want to point out is that I don't get this whole "mentoring" thing that sounds so good and holy to everyone cause in reality nobody owes me shit and they know it and they act on it.

BTW I am the only liberal in the office out of 20. Perhaps I think too much and too critically for them. That's why I LUV ARCHINECT! I feel better already. I won't quit tomorrow at least. Maybe I'll quit next week right before that big deadline....

Jan 25, 05 11:48 pm  · 
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Heywood Djabloughme

code research? mentoring? IDP?
the T-shirt is right, architecture does suck.

Jan 26, 05 12:17 am  · 
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Suture

but if it sucks enough, after a while your really will feel good.

Jan 26, 05 12:43 am  · 
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Ms Beary

aluminate:
-three years at this place
-worked in a structural engineering firm during arch school summers
-this is first job out of school, so experience is just the three years.
-I found my mentor thru a mentor matching program thru the AIA actually, and there were extensive questionaires (100+ questions) i filled out on how i felt in many issues from office dynamics to construction methods to balancing family life with work and the program is supposed to match people with similar interests and situations. we are supposed to track our progress and report back thru this program and the questions i ask of my mentor are not dissimliar to the items addressed by this program.

thanks for all the thoughts and comments. they do help.

Jan 26, 05 12:54 am  · 
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Museschild

strawbeary, thanks for your post. you made me realize how lucky I am, but at the same time, how important it is to know when to move on. i struggle with the confidence factor, too, but am lucky enough to be in a situation where things still get thrown at me and they just have to get done. I am afraid to ask questions, but still get told to ask more if I need to. It sounds like you are in a very unproductive environment, and from other posts like you don't like your job much at all. if you are about to get promoted, check into a raise based on that and in the meantime find a new position & have more leverage to negotiate. the whole point of being an architect is doing what you love, and these people you work with sound like they're too burned-out to realize the good thing they have going (you). i disagree that architects aren't teachers--we ideally teach all the time, teach our own ideas and communicate solutions to clients. if people care about what they do, they want to pass it on. don't stay with people like that or you'll catch the mediocre indifference disease as well!! go with your gut & run away!

Jan 26, 05 1:08 am  · 
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el jeffe

Strawbeary,
Three years at your first job is PLENTY long enough. At this stage in your career, advancement almost always comes as a result of a lateral move (switching jobs) not a vertical move in the same office. Get out and experience different office sizes and practice areas.
One of the principals in my office (150+ people in 3 cities) went to work for my office right out of school and has NEVER LEFT. I cringe when I imagine how narrow his view of architecture (or life for that matter) must be...

Jan 26, 05 10:31 am  · 
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BOTS

‘i already know they are not for me. a little detail i hide from them.’

The may know this and therefore are see no benefit in giving you the time you need.

I'd move. No Practice is infallible. A broad base is required for Architecture and time is passing.

Good Luck

Jan 26, 05 12:17 pm  · 
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newstreamlinedmodel

Here’s what I think. You’ve been an intern for three years and you’re good at that and it’s hard to find good interns and train them so why would they move you up? Especially why would the burned out old lifer guys one notch up in the hierarchy go out of their way to teach you how to do their job? The last thing a burned out old lifer wants is someone younger and cheaper and more enthusiastic running around who knows how do what they get paid for.

My advice is don’t whine about it. Tell mention to your boss (who might have some interest in having you be able to do more stuff) that you’d like to pick up some more skills and make your self more useful (and maybe get paid a bit more) but the design is going to get done by the guys who do it.

Since you and the other intern seem to have a dialog going on you should start doing competitions together or trying to find small projects to do on the side and, yeah, you should probably start looking for a way to move on from there.

It sounds like what you have is a day job, which is fine if it’s paying for something else but no good if you’re looking for a place to practice your own work.

Good luck

Jan 27, 05 11:37 pm  · 
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