After a lengthy stretch of unemployment, I am finally looking out of state for work. I'm currently located Midwest, and would like to go left, right or down. This stuff is what I did since the layoff.
If I ended a sentence in a preposition or a graphic is upside-down, please let me know. I have a cover, but it is a separate file. Thanks!
not sure if you looking for graphic critique but I think every page gets a lot better if you delete the two black bars running across the top of every page...you work is really good, just let it sand out on the page without any visual competition.
Actually really enjoyed looking through it. Nice work and fun to see what you came up with on your own. The renderings turned out really nice. Models, work and layout is really clean. Would be fun to see one sexy detail of how the skin in "cabin in a field" works. Like how to resolve the connection of the wood to the glass, how it turns the corner, etc.
Not a lot of time to read everything, but it seems like the dimensions of some of your floor plans are a little off. Like there won't be enough room to get through spaces in relation to where you put the furniture, and some of it seems to be weird scales in relation to everything else. Will that staircase in the treehouse project really get you all the way up to the next level? I can't see how there will be room. Other little things I notice right away include how you capitalized the first word after a semi-colon in the first project's concept write-up. I think you also have a run-on sentence in that part as well (or it seems way too long and should be broken up).
yeah, just proofread it. I think the way you've written it up sounds good and the ideas are there. Just read it out loud and listen for what doesn't sound right. Good luck with the job search. If you want to do architecture, I think moving around often will be par for the course for all of us.
I didn't do a complete, thorough proofread or anything. But I did notice on the last page of your skate shop you said something like the building was shaped like the asterisk glyph "not surprisingly". I wouldn't bother saying the "not surprisingly" part, or maybe put it another way like "the building footprint is graphically linked to the logo, in effect becoming the logo" or similar. You should tie it to the advertising principles of Venturi's duck.
But if you do decide to keep the words "not surprisingly", make sure to put a comma before and after them.
I also noticed at the very end of the same paragraph you're missing a "d" from the word "and". (You say "an".)
Yeah it sucks everywhere but the Midwest really does. IL/ Chicago seems to be a sinking ship as far as I can tell. A lot of my friends are leaving.
I like your presentation and imagination. Thanks for sharing.
Really good stuff. Simple but interesting. I actually like the way you structured these elegant exercises in a form of a novel. What did you use to build and render the models? Sketchup and Maxwell/Vray? Where are you located in the midwest, just out of curiosity?
I think you have a great selection of work here. Just a few things I would tweak to make it really sing:
1: Hanging Punctuation: Depending on if you used Illustrator or InDesign, they are located in different menus. Just google search it. It will really clean up the edges of your paragraph, as it will move the punctuation outside of the margin. It sounds odd, but it looks cleaner than having it inside the margin.
2: I actually like the black bar, I think it helps to ground the pages and give them a nice, structured quality. I feel like maybe you could play around with either eliminating the project title after the first page or just reducing it to a gray scale.
3: I get the pause symbol in the book. It works as a divider. I don't understand why it has a footer on every page.
4: It would be nice to see a few of these images much larger. That library rendering would make a nice spread. Also having just a few pages that full-bleed would help make the black bars seems less tedious. It also makes people pay attention more... you shift their focus from the repetition of the other pages. Cabin in the Field - Page 13 should fill the whole page. Eliminate everything else (page number, name).
5: The drawings are great. I like the blue line and the starkness of them. Adding a detail or a wall section that shows something a little more developed would really add another level to this collection of work. Show us you are more than just a good schematic designer. Just one will do.
6: Hooray for Serifs!
7: Don't ruin this by using a generic resume layout or different fonts. You've established a good graphic ideology... use it throughout the remainder of your application and personal marketing materials.
Good luck. It's rough out there and trying to convince employers to hire someone out-of-state is pretty difficult. It's something I've been fighting against for the better part of 2 years.
the representation of the work is pleasing (though i agree the two black bars look heavy-handed relative to the lightness of the rest of the layout). the asterisk project is by far the weakest project of the lot. it's not at all spatial. and the arc project strikes me as not being terribly profound. (i think most anyone who uses the arc command in acad comes to the same realization.) do you have any work that shows greater spatial complexity than these projects? while the representation is nice, the architecture strikes me as being less sophisticated.
also, just noticed that you wrote you undertook these projects after your unemployment - honestly it shows. there appears to be no real constraints on any of the work, and i believe the work really suffers because of that. several years ago i created a series of house projects between jobs and while it is a good way to learn new techniques, the work itself ends up being quite vapid. i would instead repackage the work that you've done in an office or that you did in school. i think it will produce a much more dynamic portfolio.
The prologue is a nice touch. You don’t see one in a lot of portfolios. But you set yourself up for failure. I feel you’re giving yourself an unconstructive criticism about your work. All I heard was “here’s some stuff I worked on that’s incomplete and stuff I messed around after graduation”. I also didn’t sense any confidence in your text. There are strong construction systems in each of your projects that you don’t highlight that employers might want to know such as the House^3. The staircase, the library, the natural lighting, and the structure of the house are things that are interesting to read. The floating staircase that you show in the image cantilevers without any railings and visually hasn’t any support at all. Was that intentionally or by accident? The opening near the floor in the library is an interesting concept. Would like to hear your thoughts about it. I know I wouldn’t what to live in a house like that since it might be depressing. Around noon and beyond, the sunlight would be directly above the house, and most rooms would be dark. Demonstrating these features tells me that you have a basic knowledge of construction and might put you in a better position than others. Although this portfolio lacks professional experience, which some people include in their portfolios and sometimes improves their position in the callbacks/interview process, your layouts are quite pleasing. It’s simple, sleek, and interesting. But leave it as is, and I’ll think nothing less of it and go on to the next portfolio.
I think the overall presentation of your book is great. I agree with CC and think the black bars work well to add some foundation to each page. The graphic style of the drawings, and even some of the page layout, reminds me of Mark Magazine (and obviously, the skate shop reminiscent of Wallpaper). I also agree that adding a drawing/model/photo of a detail or connection could introduce a new level of construction and material awareness that would really help to sell yourself to potential employers.
And in your out-of-state job searching, do not head 'down'. The only decent place in the 1000-mile radius of the South and Southwest is Austin. Any place else down south and your life with suck.
Feb 5, 11 9:47 am ·
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Do me a favor and proof this.
After a lengthy stretch of unemployment, I am finally looking out of state for work. I'm currently located Midwest, and would like to go left, right or down. This stuff is what I did since the layoff.
If I ended a sentence in a preposition or a graphic is upside-down, please let me know. I have a cover, but it is a separate file. Thanks!
http://issuu.com/calvin_maas/docs/current_portfolio
not sure if you looking for graphic critique but I think every page gets a lot better if you delete the two black bars running across the top of every page...you work is really good, just let it sand out on the page without any visual competition.
Actually really enjoyed looking through it. Nice work and fun to see what you came up with on your own. The renderings turned out really nice. Models, work and layout is really clean. Would be fun to see one sexy detail of how the skin in "cabin in a field" works. Like how to resolve the connection of the wood to the glass, how it turns the corner, etc.
Not a lot of time to read everything, but it seems like the dimensions of some of your floor plans are a little off. Like there won't be enough room to get through spaces in relation to where you put the furniture, and some of it seems to be weird scales in relation to everything else. Will that staircase in the treehouse project really get you all the way up to the next level? I can't see how there will be room. Other little things I notice right away include how you capitalized the first word after a semi-colon in the first project's concept write-up. I think you also have a run-on sentence in that part as well (or it seems way too long and should be broken up).
yeah, just proofread it. I think the way you've written it up sounds good and the ideas are there. Just read it out loud and listen for what doesn't sound right. Good luck with the job search. If you want to do architecture, I think moving around often will be par for the course for all of us.
I didn't do a complete, thorough proofread or anything. But I did notice on the last page of your skate shop you said something like the building was shaped like the asterisk glyph "not surprisingly". I wouldn't bother saying the "not surprisingly" part, or maybe put it another way like "the building footprint is graphically linked to the logo, in effect becoming the logo" or similar. You should tie it to the advertising principles of Venturi's duck.
But if you do decide to keep the words "not surprisingly", make sure to put a comma before and after them.
I also noticed at the very end of the same paragraph you're missing a "d" from the word "and". (You say "an".)
Yeah it sucks everywhere but the Midwest really does. IL/ Chicago seems to be a sinking ship as far as I can tell. A lot of my friends are leaving.
I like your presentation and imagination. Thanks for sharing.
Really good stuff. Simple but interesting. I actually like the way you structured these elegant exercises in a form of a novel. What did you use to build and render the models? Sketchup and Maxwell/Vray? Where are you located in the midwest, just out of curiosity?
_
I think you have a great selection of work here. Just a few things I would tweak to make it really sing:
1: Hanging Punctuation: Depending on if you used Illustrator or InDesign, they are located in different menus. Just google search it. It will really clean up the edges of your paragraph, as it will move the punctuation outside of the margin. It sounds odd, but it looks cleaner than having it inside the margin.
2: I actually like the black bar, I think it helps to ground the pages and give them a nice, structured quality. I feel like maybe you could play around with either eliminating the project title after the first page or just reducing it to a gray scale.
3: I get the pause symbol in the book. It works as a divider. I don't understand why it has a footer on every page.
4: It would be nice to see a few of these images much larger. That library rendering would make a nice spread. Also having just a few pages that full-bleed would help make the black bars seems less tedious. It also makes people pay attention more... you shift their focus from the repetition of the other pages. Cabin in the Field - Page 13 should fill the whole page. Eliminate everything else (page number, name).
5: The drawings are great. I like the blue line and the starkness of them. Adding a detail or a wall section that shows something a little more developed would really add another level to this collection of work. Show us you are more than just a good schematic designer. Just one will do.
6: Hooray for Serifs!
7: Don't ruin this by using a generic resume layout or different fonts. You've established a good graphic ideology... use it throughout the remainder of your application and personal marketing materials.
Good luck. It's rough out there and trying to convince employers to hire someone out-of-state is pretty difficult. It's something I've been fighting against for the better part of 2 years.
Very nice work. Corrections:
p 2 ". . . requirement THAT all dimensions . . . BE equal."
p 3 "cube's" add apostrophe
p 5 "space as is often the case in . . ."
p 18 ". . . which offers a unique if not challenging . . ." drop comma
p 24 ". . . to its product graphic, is based not . . ." add comma
p 26 "and" SP -- owner's [singular possessive] or owners' [plural possessive]
the representation of the work is pleasing (though i agree the two black bars look heavy-handed relative to the lightness of the rest of the layout). the asterisk project is by far the weakest project of the lot. it's not at all spatial. and the arc project strikes me as not being terribly profound. (i think most anyone who uses the arc command in acad comes to the same realization.) do you have any work that shows greater spatial complexity than these projects? while the representation is nice, the architecture strikes me as being less sophisticated.
also, just noticed that you wrote you undertook these projects after your unemployment - honestly it shows. there appears to be no real constraints on any of the work, and i believe the work really suffers because of that. several years ago i created a series of house projects between jobs and while it is a good way to learn new techniques, the work itself ends up being quite vapid. i would instead repackage the work that you've done in an office or that you did in school. i think it will produce a much more dynamic portfolio.
The prologue is a nice touch. You don’t see one in a lot of portfolios. But you set yourself up for failure. I feel you’re giving yourself an unconstructive criticism about your work. All I heard was “here’s some stuff I worked on that’s incomplete and stuff I messed around after graduation”. I also didn’t sense any confidence in your text. There are strong construction systems in each of your projects that you don’t highlight that employers might want to know such as the House^3. The staircase, the library, the natural lighting, and the structure of the house are things that are interesting to read. The floating staircase that you show in the image cantilevers without any railings and visually hasn’t any support at all. Was that intentionally or by accident? The opening near the floor in the library is an interesting concept. Would like to hear your thoughts about it. I know I wouldn’t what to live in a house like that since it might be depressing. Around noon and beyond, the sunlight would be directly above the house, and most rooms would be dark. Demonstrating these features tells me that you have a basic knowledge of construction and might put you in a better position than others. Although this portfolio lacks professional experience, which some people include in their portfolios and sometimes improves their position in the callbacks/interview process, your layouts are quite pleasing. It’s simple, sleek, and interesting. But leave it as is, and I’ll think nothing less of it and go on to the next portfolio.
I think the overall presentation of your book is great. I agree with CC and think the black bars work well to add some foundation to each page. The graphic style of the drawings, and even some of the page layout, reminds me of Mark Magazine (and obviously, the skate shop reminiscent of Wallpaper). I also agree that adding a drawing/model/photo of a detail or connection could introduce a new level of construction and material awareness that would really help to sell yourself to potential employers.
And in your out-of-state job searching, do not head 'down'. The only decent place in the 1000-mile radius of the South and Southwest is Austin. Any place else down south and your life with suck.
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