I’m not really sure if this is going to lead to any revelations or anything like that, but just really feel like I’d like some external perspectives on my current mindset from those in the field. I apologise as this will probably be rather long-winded, but would appreciate any feedback anyone can give me.

Basically I’m a year away from completing a double major in Marketing and International studies at university in Melbourne, but don’t have any idea where I want to go from there. Sure, some of the topics I’ve covered are interesting but not yet have I experienced anywhere near the same satisfaction as I used to get from designing. For about 8 years of my life, right through secondary school, I was certain that I wanted to be an architect. I would sit at school all day fantasising about different building designs I would come up with in my head, my books would have structures developing off the margins..basically it felt like I always had part of my mind thinking about buildings and making environments, and how people would engage in these environments. Actually I especially loved wondering about how people would engage with a space, and how different elements would create different experiences. When I would come home I would get a notepad out and draw ideas down onto paper. Generally I’d draw the floorplans to scale, and my mind would hold the idea about how the building looked from these. Any more peculiar or unusual elements I thought about would be expressed in some sort of elevation sketch. During these times when I would draw, I would fall into some kind of other world. Time would just go and I could spend the whole evening sketching, and would do so many nights a week. I would get so excited when I thought of a new idea I could hardly wait to test it out on paper. And it is this feeling of such absolute excitement and satisfaction that I have not been able to find in any other fields I have come across.

In my final year of school something just happened over some period of time and I lost that drive. I just wouldn’t come home and sketch. The many architecture books I had accumulated over the years sat untouched on my shelves. Gradually I became more and more detached from the idea of myself as an architect. It was really difficult, I felt I’d lost a major part of myself, and in a way still do.

Now that I have experienced that wonderful feeling that I got from coming up with and sketching ideas, I want to have that passion in what I end up doing. I still think about design a lot, and sometime will put some ideas to paper, but not as much as I used to.

I’m not sure what I’m looking for in posting this but I guess I’m just looking for some advice or see if anyone has been though anything similar.

Thanks guys