After leaving a toxic, abusive office, I have been in a new job now for a few months and I'm loving it. I work in the public sector, which is like a dream, and finally feel ready to settle in to a more sustainable place in life. It really is like a dream job. Office is fun, projects are engaging, and at first, I felt extremely relieved. Going from the private sector to the public sector has been a culture shock, but mostly a good one.
I wanted some advice about my probationary period. I had my first review yesterday, which in a word, was not good. I've only been at the job for two months so they acknowledged that A) they had very little to go on and B) many things had already been corrected by the time the review was submitted. But anyways, the review reveals a few things:
- A chronic illness I have, IBD (think Chron's disease) is causing problems. I have started coming in early to the office, which is challenging, but it seems to have helped me make a better impression. However, it was noted that working from home is "simply not done", and the four times I have done this during bad symptoms/flairs has been concerning to them. I had requested approval for it and it was approved, but even so I think I ran afoul of a cultural norm for more old-fashioned government jobs.
- I found out that the walls have ears. Coworkers I became friendly with early on had reported things they found worrisome, which makes me feel extremely paranoid. I'm already a very anxious person, and the feeling of being watched does not help. The office is in a very provincial, tight-knit area of New England where outsiders are regarded with suspicion. Luckily for me I was born there - though now I know that I have to be careful about where I share my own concerns and with whom.
- I have been told that, verbatim, "we're watching you!", although it was tongue-in-cheek, sort of. I feel a little spooked by this. The office is part of the town government and the culture is very, very different from past firms I've worked at. I feel that I'm catching on too slowly and it could be detrimental.
I have my next review in October. I feel very worried. I should add that I spent most my savings to relocate for this job, and can't really fathom having to find something else in six months. Of course, their attitude has been more or less indifferent. They barely know me - why would they go out of their way to make it work?
Share your thoughts? Otherwise, people are funny, good natured, and seemingly kind. The work I'm doing is amazing. I has otherwise been my dream job. I really, really want it to work out. Am I in denial? I don't want to bail again - I changed jobs more than once in 2022 due to financial mismanagement at small offices (clients walking away, staff getting cut) and I don't want to change again. I really, really want this to work out.
Thank you!
archanonymous
Jun 18, 23 3:30 am
That sounds toxic as hell, I'd say you are in denial.
That said, public sector is a totally different beast. From the experiences of friends and family I'd say it's just as if not more cutthroat than private, just in a totally different way.
I recommend you reread the employee handbook and any other similar documents you were provided and take them really seriously. know them backwards and forwards and work to the letter of what they say.
Preemptively file a complaint with HR that you feel as though you were retaliated against for your protected medical disability.
With coworkers, I'd be a bit less forthcoming with opinions. The most powerful coworker among peers is the one who everyone thinks is a great listener because they can always talk to them, but never overshares themselves. They know where all the pressure points are, how to get people in their side, and noone has anything on them.
SouthCoast
Jun 18, 23 8:31 am
I read the employee handbook which hasn't been updated in decades; it predates the existence of the town architect's office. I definitely feel like I should be less chummy. Everyone is nearing retirement, so I never sensed any concern about competition.
archanonymous
Jun 18, 23 4:34 pm
It's not about competition it's about status, hierarchy, ego, and just plain drama.
reallynotmyname
Jun 22, 23 10:36 am
It would not be wrong to formally request HR to update the employee handbook to include your current position.
SouthCoast
Jun 18, 23 8:35 am
This really came about because I was very excited about finally being pre-approved for a mortgage, and beginning the house search. This has been my primary goal for eight years, and my housing situation is very temporary, so I can't wait to get more established. When I mentioned it in the office, (this was weeks before my review) my boss said "I might wait on that." I assumed he was referring to the market. He wasn't. "Let's see if this works first. In six months we'll know more. You wouldn't want a house that you can't pay for if this doesn't work out." It makes me wonder if the decision to cut me after the six month probation has already been made.
reallynotmyname
Jun 22, 23 10:33 am
It's always a good idea to wait a year or two before buying a house when you relocate for a job. You really need to make sure the job is one you want long-term before jumping into property ownership.
Orhan Ayyüce
Jun 18, 23 1:24 pm
Just do your best. Don't over-project. Not the end of the world anyway. You might even end up in a better place, if this doesn't work out. Your context is very similar to academia and the tenure process. If you want it bad enough, you'll endure and keep the job. Concentrate on your work. That will give you security more than anything else. You have to like what you do to put up with all this pollution and cut through. And, yes, before you buy a house.
Josh Mings
Jun 18, 23 2:09 pm
That sounds like absolute hell, and unfortunately it sounds like it might be a town where there may not be many other options? Definitely do what others have mentioned but you’ve got to start making your own exit plan too.
Hello everyone,
After leaving a toxic, abusive office, I have been in a new job now for a few months and I'm loving it. I work in the public sector, which is like a dream, and finally feel ready to settle in to a more sustainable place in life. It really is like a dream job. Office is fun, projects are engaging, and at first, I felt extremely relieved. Going from the private sector to the public sector has been a culture shock, but mostly a good one.
I wanted some advice about my probationary period. I had my first review yesterday, which in a word, was not good. I've only been at the job for two months so they acknowledged that A) they had very little to go on and B) many things had already been corrected by the time the review was submitted. But anyways, the review reveals a few things:
- A chronic illness I have, IBD (think Chron's disease) is causing problems. I have started coming in early to the office, which is challenging, but it seems to have helped me make a better impression. However, it was noted that working from home is "simply not done", and the four times I have done this during bad symptoms/flairs has been concerning to them. I had requested approval for it and it was approved, but even so I think I ran afoul of a cultural norm for more old-fashioned government jobs.
- I found out that the walls have ears. Coworkers I became friendly with early on had reported things they found worrisome, which makes me feel extremely paranoid. I'm already a very anxious person, and the feeling of being watched does not help. The office is in a very provincial, tight-knit area of New England where outsiders are regarded with suspicion. Luckily for me I was born there - though now I know that I have to be careful about where I share my own concerns and with whom.
- I have been told that, verbatim, "we're watching you!", although it was tongue-in-cheek, sort of. I feel a little spooked by this. The office is part of the town government and the culture is very, very different from past firms I've worked at. I feel that I'm catching on too slowly and it could be detrimental.
I have my next review in October. I feel very worried. I should add that I spent most my savings to relocate for this job, and can't really fathom having to find something else in six months. Of course, their attitude has been more or less indifferent. They barely know me - why would they go out of their way to make it work?
Share your thoughts? Otherwise, people are funny, good natured, and seemingly kind. The work I'm doing is amazing. I has otherwise been my dream job. I really, really want it to work out. Am I in denial? I don't want to bail again - I changed jobs more than once in 2022 due to financial mismanagement at small offices (clients walking away, staff getting cut) and I don't want to change again. I really, really want this to work out.
Thank you!
That sounds toxic as hell, I'd say you are in denial.
That said, public sector is a totally different beast. From the experiences of friends and family I'd say it's just as if not more cutthroat than private, just in a totally different way.
I recommend you reread the employee handbook and any other similar documents you were provided and take them really seriously. know them backwards and forwards and work to the letter of what they say.
Preemptively file a complaint with HR that you feel as though you were retaliated against for your protected medical disability.
With coworkers, I'd be a bit less forthcoming with opinions. The most powerful coworker among peers is the one who everyone thinks is a great listener because they can always talk to them, but never overshares themselves. They know where all the pressure points are, how to get people in their side, and noone has anything on them.
I read the employee handbook which hasn't been updated in decades; it predates the existence of the town architect's office. I definitely feel like I should be less chummy. Everyone is nearing retirement, so I never sensed any concern about competition.
It's not about competition it's about status, hierarchy, ego, and just plain drama.
It would not be wrong to formally request HR to update the employee handbook to include your current position.
This really came about because I was very excited about finally being pre-approved for a mortgage, and beginning the house search. This has been my primary goal for eight years, and my housing situation is very temporary, so I can't wait to get more established. When I mentioned it in the office, (this was weeks before my review) my boss said "I might wait on that." I assumed he was referring to the market. He wasn't. "Let's see if this works first. In six months we'll know more. You wouldn't want a house that you can't pay for if this doesn't work out." It makes me wonder if the decision to cut me after the six month probation has already been made.
It's always a good idea to wait a year or two before buying a house when you relocate for a job. You really need to make sure the job is one you want long-term before jumping into property ownership.
Just do your best. Don't over-project. Not the end of the world anyway. You might even end up in a better place, if this doesn't work out. Your context is very similar to academia and the tenure process. If you want it bad enough, you'll endure and keep the job.
Concentrate on your work. That will give you security more than anything else. You have to like what you do to put up with all this pollution and cut through. And, yes, before you buy a house.
That sounds like absolute hell, and unfortunately it sounds like it might be a town where there may not be many other options? Definitely do what others have mentioned but you’ve got to start making your own exit plan too.