My friends, remember the good old days on Archinect where our beloved haiku thread grew to an incredible length?
We need a new one here, and this is it. I won't be satisfied until virtually ever topic known to man has been covered in eloquent 5-7-5 format. Yah, that's right, I expect to see no less than 825 replies by 5: p.m. Friday September 23.
Just as a reminder, some of the more popular topics in the world today that you may write a haiku about include:
Sex, money, cars, landscaping, working, comedy, Internets, hurricanes, Bush hating, John Roberts, painting, office pranks, motorcycle wheelies that seem to last forever, problems sending email, portfilios, moronic professors, porcupines, and silk panties.
Official Archinect Haiku Thread
My friends, remember the good old days on Archinect where our beloved haiku thread grew to an incredible length?
We need a new one here, and this is it. I won't be satisfied until virtually ever topic known to man has been covered in eloquent 5-7-5 format. Yah, that's right, I expect to see no less than 825 replies by 5: p.m. Friday September 23.
Just as a reminder, some of the more popular topics in the world today that you may write a haiku about include:
Sex, money, cars, landscaping, working, comedy, Internets, hurricanes, Bush hating, John Roberts, painting, office pranks, motorcycle wheelies that seem to last forever, problems sending email, portfilios, moronic professors, porcupines, and silk panties.
Let the games begin!
Hurricane Rita
I'm gonna slap you around
You destructive bitch
Hey there professor
Will you put me down again?
salty tears taste great
Oh tortuous job
You drive the edge deeper still
I yearn for freedom
O fickle women
now from predator to prey
you have transformed me
one two three four five
two three four five six seven
five four three two one
[I have a stored copy of the old thread, by the way.]
l f l l
r m x u
u u q
or:
line fillet line line
rotate move explode undo
undo undo save
cruising slowly by
circling the park watched by
joggers in nylon
bass rattles the trunk
i lean across for best sound
stereo fills sky
hard bodies swoon when
glitter blue car paint sparkles
yeah i own this town
Holy crap not per correll, that's really good!
a good office joke
eat lunch in a bathroom stall
on a T.V. tray
hey there pretty girl
are you fine with me staring
at your exposed thong?
I've got a feeling
we'll be much better off when
democrats control
parking schemes all day
thinking I will see her soon
why am i so tense?
a witch on a broom
could never scare me as much
as seeing Bush nude
dammson, you are tense
because you are all backed up
better rub one out!
not during lunch break
i'll just smoke three cigarettes
after a taco
Ur-sprawl city blue
and red lights do not confuse
walking with freedom
trying to plan site
no place for the loading dock
will read archinect
MM's thong haiku is wonderful, as is the pimp-mobile one by not per
hello product rep
pretty girl that talks to me
but your tiles stink
blood-sucking leeches
have invaded my nostrils
at first it tickles
but then I'm in shock
I feel them crawling higher
I start to feel sick
they're at the door now
seeking entry to my brain
cannot hold them off
suddenly it starts
I feel a warm liquid flow
as my eyes squint shut
it passes my lips
as my tongue investigates
fears are realized
the leeches have found
an artery to call home
and I am helpless
under their control
my nervous system reacts
I am now in shock
blood pressure races
it won't be much longer now
cannot hold them off
frontal lobe cries out
I am fading, fading fast
I am, I am, dead
blood-lust, blood-letting
call it what you will my friend
some just love the taste
tonsil-hockey pro
so that's what you call yourself
on the bus to school
"What's the latest craze?"
your mom said, curious like,
as dinner was served.
"Can't really say, mom."
"But we do use clean needles,"
you said with a grin.
"Homemade tats? No!"
she screamed, slamming a plate down.
"What's wrong with you son?"
"Uh, no, that's not right,"
you said, confused as ever.
"We're shooting up crack."
might as well go for
a soda nobody hurts
and nobody cries
Interested in me?
the corner hooker cried out
I will rock your world
asleep on the couch
whisky bottles on the floor
drink the pain away
sharpen your claws cat
we're sending you off to war
with the rats and mice
what's wrong everyone?
can you not keep up with me,
the haiku master?
get those pants off girl
armageddon is coming
be my final thrill
let me show you how
we will prepare our assault
like Animal House
blood-sucking zombies
at the front door, so he says
our son has nightmares
Landscaping jackass
peaking in at my wife's breasts
get back to your mulch
Thomas Tank Engine
Is the dumbest to ever
with that phallic nose
Thomas Tank Engine
Is the dumbest toy ever
with that phallic nose
got time to kill? asked
manteno montenegro
fifty more haiku...
hey! i love haiku!
you archinecters are great!
how did you guys know?
I am a machine
when it comes to dreaming up
glorious haiku
I caught Frank Gehry
in the bathroom at Chili's
lotioning his wand
Too much time to spare
Manteno Montenegro
Is his pseudonym?
Le Corbusier
loved to have his caviar
hand fed by virgins
Adios my friends
the end of the day is here
this is where I leave!
are they saddened
being strong men with money
and wishing they had their youth
i said racism
she said, "i'm not!"but i was
not talking to her
dont know how they hired
these people at such a good
place. i guess it's not.
a b c d e
f g h i j k l
m n o p q
goodbye manteno
guess archinect does not feel
like poets today
girls like my hair long
boss likes it clean-cut
mullet solution!
hey there pretty girl
why don't you lift your skirt up
show me your goodies
in walmart toy aisle
wailing boy wants wrestling doll
mama whups his ass
damn i'm fucking drunk
another beer bartender
face plant i'll sleep here
neverending work
install, nail, paint, but still my
kitchen eludes me
Conan O'Brien
has a bandaid on his chin
but he's still funny
Corn on the cob, John.
You put too damn much butter!
John drops his first COB.
Cob on the ground now
Don’t eat that dirty cob, friend
Unsanitary
will i die here, in
this studio, idea
empty, self doubt full?
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